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Depression Support Center Depression Support Center

i did the worst thing ever yesterday.

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I drank at a bbq. I drank so much I couldn't drive home. I drank so much I raged at dh and punched him hard. I drank do much I scared my bil. W aspsergers and they kept lo from me

I have to go downstairs now and appplogise to my bil

I haven't drank in years Bc this is what happens.
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by on May. 13, 2012 at 7:15 AM
Replies (11-19):
DixieL
by on May. 13, 2012 at 1:55 PM

I used to be the same way when I drank. They will forgive you. Happy Mother's Day

single_and_preg
by on May. 13, 2012 at 2:50 PM

im going to my second aa meeting tonight, I now have crimina charges and court dates i have to worry about because drinking with my medications made me act crazy.

mrsvixen
by Gold Member on May. 13, 2012 at 3:06 PM

hugsYou are human, you made a mistake. Don't beat yourself up over it momma. Your a very caring, loving, special woman.

I was once told when my rage came out like that, it was because I felt safe with the person I was with. I knew I could rage at him, and even hit him, and he wouldn't hurt me back. I used to have such a problem with rage.

Today is a new start, forgive yourself and move on >)

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matreshka
by Ruby Member on May. 13, 2012 at 7:57 PM
Thank you so much

Quoting Tracys2:

I'm so very sorry!

Please don't be so hard on yourself. You say you slip up every few years. That means you have years where you don't slip up, and you're responsible, and you wave away drinks people are trying to give you. That is not easy. And look what you're doing now. You feel bad. You're apologising. You're being really hard on yourself. Those are all signs of a good person who made a mistake. You are going to need to forgive yourself, just as much as they are.

Hugs to you, and peace, and healing.

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matreshka
by Ruby Member on May. 13, 2012 at 8:02 PM
What helped your rage? I think u and I went through some similar issues in life. Sexual abuse and physical abuse and verbal.

Quoting mrsvixen:

hugsYou are human, you made a mistake. Don't beat yourself up over it momma. Your a very caring, loving, special woman.

I was once told when my rage came out like that, it was because I felt safe with the person I was with. I knew I could rage at him, and even hit him, and he wouldn't hurt me back. I used to have such a problem with rage.

Today is a new start, forgive yourself and move on >)

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
TateTwo
by on May. 14, 2012 at 12:22 AM

If you were perfect, you're name would be Jesus.

As it is, you've asked for forgiveness and you've received it from two very important people in your life who obviously love you very much. 

Do they know the reason for your rage?  Is your family willing to help you get through episodes like this? 

There's every reason in the world to walk away when you stub your toe but there's a universe of reasons to stay and forgive yourself and keep moving forward.  You're a good person (I can tell by your responses on some of the threads).  Cut yourself a little slack here.

Quoting matreshka:

Took my am meds and had breakfast. I think dh should divorce me.  I'm not a good person.  I slip up every few years like this.  I don't want my kids to be like this.  Luckily my oldest didn't see any of it because he wasn't with me.


Naturewoman4
by on May. 14, 2012 at 12:47 AM

Oh Matreshka, don't be so hard on yourself.  I think you're a wonderful person, just by reading all your posts over the past yr.  We all do things & mess up.  Do you know why you drank so much?  Was it because you were trying to be more social?  I'm sure your family & husband loves you so much, so having a slip up doesn't change that at all.  girl giving flower

Quoting matreshka:

Took my am meds and had breakfast. I think dh should divorce me.  I'm not a good person.  I slip up every few years like this.  I don't want my kids to be like this.  Luckily my oldest didn't see any of it because he wasn't with me.


reindeer-c
by on May. 14, 2012 at 5:23 AM

So sorry for what you are going through. Beating yourself and not taking the time to look at why you could not resist the drinks is more important. I think knowing why you drank will help you the next time temptation rears its ugly head! Hugs to you. You r hubby should not want to divorce you. Couples need to stikck together and work through these issues. He loves you and needs to hear how upset and sorry you about this.

rhodaj
by rho on May. 14, 2012 at 5:44 AM

I'm sorry, I'm sure you didn't mean to do to it. Sometimes when others is drinking and having a good time we just get caught up in the moment not thinking of how it will effect you. You know what happened and you appogized and I know you well enough to know you won't do it again.

hugs rho

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