Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What my husband called me last night.

 Last night my dogs got out. This is a common occurance and it pisses DH off. Well i managed to get my puppy in the house but i left the door opened for my other one that was at the door and i chased her around the coffee table and she got out again. My husband called me mentally defiecent! I told him why i left the door open hoping that Butch would come in and he said that would not work because he thinks its a game and he thinks hes in charge (my dog) so its best to close the door and get Bella in the kennel and wait for Butch to stracth at the door to let us know. I was crying while looking for the dogs at 9 last night and i finally got them back. He told me i dont think and he wonders about me sometimes and i should start reading to improve my brain. I didnt drink cuz he called me that and I didnt hit him. I tried my best to bite my lip and instead i cried while folding and putting away laundry. He apologized and I told him maybe hes right because i have never been that bright and maybe i should go get tested and again he said no you can be smart you just need to read. Now i expect you all to bash my husband and whatever you say is not going to affect me because normally i would get worked up about it.

by on May. 15, 2012 at 8:58 AM
Replies (11-20):
tigerlover85379
by on May. 15, 2012 at 9:36 AM

 No he apologized for what he called me.

Quoting rhodaj:

I thought he quit drinking all alcohal. You can't keep apoligizing to him because he is going to think it is all right to talk to you that way. if I would have known that in my first reply I would not have said what I did. Harmony. Don't take this as a bash but he needs help. Not just for him but for you and the kids.

Quoting tigerlover85379:

 Well he only drinks beer and iam proud of him for quitting hard alcohol. I just thought that because when i was 6 the school thought i was pretty much special needs for not jump roping and in college they told me in a nice way that im pretty much slow.


 

mrsvixen
by Gold Member on May. 15, 2012 at 1:00 PM

You handled that very well! Good for you for not drinking!

lucy164
by Peggy on May. 16, 2012 at 7:27 AM

good for you for not picking up a drink.  i don't think your reasoning was faulty about the dog.  i'm glad you got them back.  you don't sound in your posts that you are not bright in fact just the opposite.

Renee47
by on May. 16, 2012 at 3:50 PM

I am sorry sometimes people say mean things in the heat of the moment hugs

Jennpuck
by on May. 16, 2012 at 6:37 PM

 Can you even believe how far you've come??? You didn't pick up a drink. You didn't beat him to a pulp. Give yourself the kudos you deserve!

I know when one of my dogs gets lost, I go into a blind panic. It does not do wonders for my cognative ability. While his poorly worded strategy *would* have been the more effective solution, I can completely follow the logic of what you did and it does make sense.

I hope your husband decides to step up and improve himself before you leave him in the dust. His default reactions and the way he relates to you could certanly stand for some improvement.

Christine9576
by on May. 17, 2012 at 12:04 AM

 He sounds unbalanced himself!

Christinewink

TateTwo
by on May. 17, 2012 at 8:58 AM
1 mom liked this

If you couldn't have put two sentences, we wouldn't have understood what you said. 

Honey, you are not stupid.  You are not dumb. You are beautiful and smart.  And I, for one, am very proud of the way you handled your emotions.  Crying is a good thing - it's a release of all that pent-up anxiety you feel after an argument so you can make room to think straight.  Men don't cry much which I think is 1/2 their problem.

It's natural to feel like you're the one at fault.  It's natural to apologize for it.  That's why your husband apologized to you.  He felt bad about saying what he said to you.  He is right about the dogs thinking it's a game - dogs can't help it because they run on instinct.  But he could have helped you with them. 

Telling you to read to get smart is not right.  You read because you want to - not to prove a point.  That takes all the fun out of reading. 

*big hugs* for keeping your cool and for not drinking!

~~ Nita
http://tatetwo.blogspot.com
Lisa_7777
by on May. 17, 2012 at 9:28 AM
1 mom liked this
Thanks mumma this also helped me too..

Quoting TateTwo:

If you couldn't have put two sentences, we wouldn't have understood what you said. 

Honey, you are not stupid.  You are not dumb. You are beautiful and smart.  And I, for one, am very proud of the way you handled your emotions.  Crying is a good thing - it's a release of all that pent-up anxiety you feel after an argument so you can make room to think straight.  Men don't cry much which I think is 1/2 their problem.

It's natural to feel like you're the one at fault.  It's natural to apologize for it.  That's why your husband apologized to you.  He felt bad about saying what he said to you.  He is right about the dogs thinking it's a game - dogs can't help it because they run on instinct.  But he could have helped you with them. 

Telling you to read to get smart is not right.  You read because you want to - not to prove a point.  That takes all the fun out of reading. 

*big hugs* for keeping your cool and for not drinking!

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Lisa_7777
by on May. 17, 2012 at 9:40 AM
I'm sorry your going through this tigerlover. I'm going through a rough rocky time myself atm and sounds like we have got a few things in common about your partner going through withdrawals and soo on..
P.s I hope we both can get to know eachother more. Goodluck mumma. All best
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
TateTwo
by on May. 17, 2012 at 9:40 AM

I'm glad, honey *big hugs*

Quoting Lisa_7777:

Thanks mumma this also helped me too..

Quoting TateTwo:

If you couldn't have put two sentences, we wouldn't have understood what you said. 

Honey, you are not stupid.  You are not dumb. You are beautiful and smart.  And I, for one, am very proud of the way you handled your emotions.  Crying is a good thing - it's a release of all that pent-up anxiety you feel after an argument so you can make room to think straight.  Men don't cry much which I think is 1/2 their problem.

It's natural to feel like you're the one at fault.  It's natural to apologize for it.  That's why your husband apologized to you.  He felt bad about saying what he said to you.  He is right about the dogs thinking it's a game - dogs can't help it because they run on instinct.  But he could have helped you with them. 

Telling you to read to get smart is not right.  You read because you want to - not to prove a point.  That takes all the fun out of reading. 

*big hugs* for keeping your cool and for not drinking!


~~ Nita
http://tatetwo.blogspot.com
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)