Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Depression Support Center Depression Support Center

Hi new here...my story

Posted by on May. 16, 2012 at 9:36 AM
  • 7 Replies

HI..my dh was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety, and was in the psych ward for 5 days cuz of it...i don't  think my kids really know how to deal with his illness, nor do i...he was in a car accident last year that totally changed his way of life..he lost his vitality, can no longer be breadwinner in the household, and has to rely on others to help him...he is also suffering from PTSD from the accident...the counseling group he is going to  seems to be helping little...the counselors are SO young, my dh is old enough to be their father...and they just don't seem to have  the life experiences needed to help my dh with his problems.  He has had older ones at this place before, and now its all younger ones and he just doens't feel like they can really relate to his mental and physical pain.  And one of the counselors is a motor mouth who goes off topic and throws the entire group off track as well..this really annoys my dh, who is trying to get along in a group.  The meds they have him on make him like a zombie to where all he does is sleep all day or he is yawning..by the time he has some pep to him, its time for another pill, and a half hour later, he's staring at the walls, unable to complete a full sentence....This is a man who ran a restaurant and had several people working under him.  And to be reduced to a person who is mediated nonstop with no abillity to physically do much..his drs are not much help on the physical end either..they just pass the buck concerning his injuries.. So, rite now, its one day at a time, and hope for a better tomorrow. 

by on May. 16, 2012 at 9:36 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-7):
leahbeah143
by Leah on May. 16, 2012 at 9:37 AM

 hugs and welcome to the group!

lyrick24
by Ruby Member on May. 16, 2012 at 10:03 AM

 maybe he is being over sedated.  have him talk to his dr about it. sometimes life throws us a curve and we have to deal with it. i would be there to support him because he needs it right now especially. hes probably thinking he will never be able to work again and thats depressing enough. i have been out of work for 15 years and have decided finally to go back. i realize i have the strength for it now. i think if he can get himself stable enough to go back into work for a little while each day it would help him. i dont know the extent of his physical illness but i hope he can overcome it with your support and feel like he can do something again. please have his dr check his meds because if he is oversedated there is no way he can go back to work. maybe he can take some of his meds at night or something. hope things work out for you.

mrsvixen
by Gold Member on May. 16, 2012 at 12:12 PM

Hello and welcome!

It's really hard when your life is turned upside down and everything you once did or knew has been changed.

It does sound like they may be over medicating or giving him the wrong time of medication.

Is there another group he can go to for therapy?

Being 45, alot of people are younger then me now, including therapists. I just try to think they may not have life experience, but they do have a different way of looking at things, that may help me.

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers


Lilypie Pregnancy tickers


Daisypath Anniversary tickers

emmy526
by Member on May. 16, 2012 at 1:23 PM

he was in a serious car wreck that smashed up the left side of his body...just being unable deal with the physical pain is bad enough, esp when you can't take pain relievers or even advil anymore as liver tests indicated a problem with his liver, so they advised him to stop taking that as well.   Oxycodone/Oxycontin's made him stop breathing....so those are outta the question as well.  No i don't honestly think he will ever do the kind of work he did for the last 25 years, just like i can't either due to physical limitations...its the adjustment to a different way of life that has helped throw him into this mental health crisis.  

Quoting lyrick24:

 maybe he is being over sedated.  have him talk to his dr about it. sometimes life throws us a curve and we have to deal with it. i would be there to support him because he needs it right now especially. hes probably thinking he will never be able to work again and thats depressing enough. i have been out of work for 15 years and have decided finally to go back. i realize i have the strength for it now. i think if he can get himself stable enough to go back into work for a little while each day it would help him. i dont know the extent of his physical illness but i hope he can overcome it with your support and feel like he can do something again. please have his dr check his meds because if he is oversedated there is no way he can go back to work. maybe he can take some of his meds at night or something. hope things work out for you.


TateTwo
by on May. 16, 2012 at 1:35 PM

When my mother-in-law was placed in hospice (bear with me on this), she wasn't getting the treatment she needed or the care.  She was moved to another hospice and the same thing happened.  When she was placed in the 3rd and, again, very little concern or care, my husband and sons took over and got mean.  They didn't get nasty or ugly - they got tough and mean.  This was a loved one it was happening to and they just weren't going to take it anymore.

They went to the doctor.  The doctor did nothing.  Then they went over the doctor's head. They ended up going to the CEO of the hospice organization to get the proper care and treatment in place.  They did it with a firm "I'm seriously not taking any crap from you" voice and a tough attitude. 

Something to consider is this: if treatment isn't working, get it changed.  Escalate this issue to the highest level if you have to.  The counselor is all wrong for your husband if your husband doesn't feel comfortable being in therapy. 

~~ Nita
http://tatetwo.blogspot.com
emmy526
by Member on May. 16, 2012 at 2:52 PM

i totally agree. thanks..i've already made mention to dh of talking to his drs about his meds, but he seems to think it needs more time..we are on ten days now, and he's still just as tired as day one...i think i'll just call the dr anyway and see what she says.  another things to consider is his pcp him on another blood pressue med, which we don't know if he will have an adverse reaction to, like the lisinopril...he had to get offa the hctz due to going on topiramax, it was a bad combo...so, we'll see whats what in the next few days..he didn't go to group today cuz his back was in too much pain to sit there on uncomfortable chairs, and pay attention. 

Quoting TateTwo:
 

Something to consider is this: if treatment isn't working, get it changed.  Escalate this issue to the highest level if you have to.  The counselor is all wrong for your husband if your husband doesn't feel comfortable being in therapy. 


TateTwo
by on May. 16, 2012 at 3:10 PM

I have always believed that there's absolutely nothing wrong with more information especially when it comes to an artificial pill invading your body and senses. Getting combinations down right is vital to one's health.

Group therapy should have a physical environment as well as an emotional environment of extreme comfort.  Can he go to a different place that has comfortable chairs, a good therapist that is more condusive to his therapy?  I believe that would help him a lot.

Quoting emmy526:

i totally agree. thanks..i've already made mention to dh of talking to his drs about his meds, but he seems to think it needs more time..we are on ten days now, and he's still just as tired as day one...i think i'll just call the dr anyway and see what she says.  another things to consider is his pcp him on another blood pressue med, which we don't know if he will have an adverse reaction to, like the lisinopril...he had to get offa the hctz due to going on topiramax, it was a bad combo...so, we'll see whats what in the next few days..he didn't go to group today cuz his back was in too much pain to sit there on uncomfortable chairs, and pay attention. 

Quoting TateTwo:
 

Something to consider is this: if treatment isn't working, get it changed.  Escalate this issue to the highest level if you have to.  The counselor is all wrong for your husband if your husband doesn't feel comfortable being in therapy. 



~~ Nita
http://tatetwo.blogspot.com
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN