new to this...feeling alone and lost

[angel_peanut]

I am a proud momma of 4 beautiful children. With in the past 2 yrs alot has happened in my life. In Oct 2010 I lost a loved one very suddenly ay just 19yrs old we were extremely close and life has never felt the same since. In Nov 2011 I found out I was pregnant, Feb 2012 my stepson moved in with us, July 30th 2012 wld have been my loved ones 21st birthday, 4 days later I gave birth to my beautiful daughter. Since then my life has been in shambles. Grieving my loved ones birthday and then trying to celebrate giving life really messed me up emotionally. On top of trying to battle these emotions my stepson that lives with us has become quit the unruly child. The stress is just piling on the.loss of my loved one and birth of my daughter has changed me on many levels....between what this has done to me mentally and having problems with my stepson my marriage is also slowly falling apart. Sometimes I feel like I'm loosing my mind, I feel so unstable, so disconnected from my husband, so angry and having anxiety attacks. I have started to see a therapist as this has effected my every day life. I'm just so lost and confused I feel like who I once was is gone

[cece5000]

I will keep you in my prayers. Praying it what I use to help me with life daily.

[matreshka]

Are you going to therapy or grief cousneling or support groups? I can relate. My granmother died when I was giving birth to LO.  I lost my best friend to suicide close to my wedding date. I am still grieving my best friend. I made peace with my grandmother who is in heaven.

I hope you find peace soon.

[angel_peanut]

My original reason for seeking therapy was for grief but we are working on many dynamics of my life as well. It was my nephew tht passed we were very close he was like another kid to me and a best friend. Since he was little I took care of him all the time once he got older he lived with me quite often. I can't even explain the bond we shared. He took his life so I know how hard it is for you to be dealing with tht. I wake up every day wishing he wld walk through my doors

[matreshka]

I can relate to a certain extent. I wish my best friend who died would be by my side again.

Quoting angel_peanut:

My original reason for seeking therapy was for grief but we are working on many dynamics of my life as well. It was my nephew tht passed we were very close he was like another kid to me and a best friend. Since he was little I took care of him all the time once he got older he lived with me quite often. I can't even explain the bond we shared. He took his life so I know how hard it is for you to be dealing with tht. I wake up every day wishing he wld walk through my doors

[leahbeah143]

 hugs! keep seeing your therapist and talk to them about some coping skills. I'm so sorry for your loss.

[lyrick24]

im so sorry for your losses. i lost my sister on my birthday, june 30th, and my nephew 4 days after my grandson was born. i had a really hard time with it but time heals everything. im glad your going to therapy. maybe you can get your husband to go with you to some therapy sessions.

[angel_peanut]

I brought him coming with me in the future. My therapist thinks it would be good for him to come to a few sessions to try and understand what I'm going through better and try to meet in the middle with my stepson some how but my husband quickly dismissed the idea :(