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Depression Support Center Depression Support Center

Having a bad day (sorry, long)

Posted by on Jan. 9, 2013 at 6:29 AM
  • 9 Replies


I feel like I can never get anything done. There are 3 adults and 4 kids in my house.  This includes me, my 20 y/o sister (Jackie) and her 21 y/o husband (Connor), my 10 y/o son (Hunter), 6 y/o son (Connor or CJ), and 11 mo old twin girls (Sierra and Dakota).

I am disabled and have panic attacks daily.  I also cannot stand or walk for very long, or bend and stoop because of my back and heart.  I clean as much as I can and take care of the kids as best as I can.  Connor works, does dishes, takes out trash, and helps with the kids.  Jackie does laundry, picks up, and helps with the kids.  Hunter helps with his sisters.  CJ plays with his sisters and that's about it.

Hunter is very mature and responsible for his age unless his brother is in the same room.  Then he gets an attitude and acts like he is 6.  CJ has some major issues but has yet to get a diagnosis.  He likes cutting things (he has cut up two playpens), sneaking into other people's things, and pretty much the whole "terrible twos" getting-into-stuff phase. 

CJ is behind on his schoolwork.  Their room is a disaster zone.  My kitchen is a complete mess.  There is BB's all over the living room floor that I cannot get the kids to pick up (CJ emptied the jar in the floor).  There are roaches taking over my kitchen no matter what bait I use.  My laundry is piled up.  And the landlord still has not fixed the damn refrigerator! (And Connor actually fixed the sink cause he was tired of waiting on the landlord)

I feel like I am one more smart mouth comment or sibling argument from having a nervous breakdown!  Thankfully my therapist appointment is tomorrow...that is if I can afford the $175 session since I have no insurance.  If I could afford it, I would hire a housekeeper or something to come and help me get caught up one good time.  *le sigh*

CafeMom Tickers
by on Jan. 9, 2013 at 6:29 AM
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Replies (1-9):
lyrick24
by Ruby Member on Jan. 9, 2013 at 8:04 AM

 i know it must be hard momma. i can relate. i have all three of my adult children living in this house and all five of my grandchildren with one on the way and my husband is stationed in ga in the army.i have to stay after them constantly to get things done and then just accept what doesnt get done. i am in poor health and am not able to do it.

leahbeah143
by Leah on Jan. 9, 2013 at 9:33 AM

 big hugs! the 10 and 6 year olds are definitely old enough to pick up after themselves, make it one of their daily chores.

matreshka
by Ruby Member on Jan. 9, 2013 at 9:45 AM

have you made a chore chart for everyone in te household? that way everyone knows what is expected of them, especially the kids.  You can do little rewards like stickers or their favorite snack or anything that is cheap or free that they like.

Please get the landlord to handle the roach situation.

JansRainbow
by on Jan. 9, 2013 at 9:57 AM

Chart a great idea. Also rewards for doing their chores. Call social services and see if you can get an IHS (in home service worker). You are disabled and should qualify. They help with cleaning, laundry and other things that needs to be done.I live in California. Waiting to see out come of an appointment before I apply. Several people in my apartment complex have them. Keep after the landlord to do the work. I will say a prayer for you. Take care. Sending hugs.

rhodaj
by rho on Jan. 9, 2013 at 10:16 AM

Hun as long as you are doing the best you can no one can ask for more. Its not like you are neglecting things you just can't do them. There is 2 people that live in my house. My husband and me. I have never been caught up on anything. I have a sink full of dishes and everything else that needs to be done. 

But as a wise woman told me this before. You can have your house as clean as it can get and a tornado could come through and know one would ever believe it was clean.  

Don't sweat over the small stuff. As long as your kids have clean clothes and food and a place to live. 

For the roaches I would be calling the landlord about that. That is his responsibilty to take care of them. 

twistandshout
by on Jan. 9, 2013 at 10:28 AM

 Sounds like you have alot on your plate. I have one of those landlord too. If I can fix what's wrong without here in my hair, I do.I am a priviate type person and don't like too many people in my house. I am just like that. I to have a hard time with house cleaning sometimes. I just do what I can when I feel good. Maybe you can hire someone to help you. I hope so. I hope you start feeling better soon. Hugs.

Serenity7
by Silver Member on Jan. 9, 2013 at 5:22 PM

 ((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))

proudmomalexis
by Member on Jan. 9, 2013 at 5:30 PM
I know you are feeling hopeless. but things will get better
A chore chart for everyone works.You should call the landlord for the roaches.Its his problem.And there are therapists who charge on a sliding scale. I feel your pain.

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lexismom90
by Bronze Member on Jan. 10, 2013 at 12:56 AM
1 mom liked this
I think we all have days sometimes even weeks like this. It can be hard and is hard. Just remember to stay strong and do the best you can do.
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