seriously considering weaning myself off of meds
I am just a little scared to do it since I have been on meds for about 22 yrs now. I have tried lots of different combos, some work better than others and some just leave me with a ton of side effects and not a lot of relief from my bipolar symptoms. The ones I am currently on make me feel like a zombie and have made me gain weight, plus I am still moody, irritable and depressed while taking them. I see a new doctor on the 28th of this month but I don't know if I want to wait til then to get off these yucky meds. I am scared of getting worse and ending up hospitalized but I know myself enough that if I felt worse being off meds I would go back on them. The only thing I worry about is that my new doctor won't want to treat me if he finds out I am not 100% med compliant. I don't even want to tell my husband bc he is not supportive of me not being on meds. I just know that right now I am barely functional and 2 1/2 wks seems like a long time to wait for some relief. I've also been feeling more anxious lately, where I wake up anxious and go to bed anxious and the anti anxiety meds that are prescribed to me aren't really working. I see my therapist next tues and I'm hoping she can give me ways of dealing with the anxiety bc right now it's eating me alive. I don't want to live like this, it really sucks. I just wish there was some kind of relief that didn't cause all sorts of crappy side effects and I'm afraid since I've been on meds so long I am running out of options.