Last night I let everything out. I talked to my husband and he just sat and listened while I sorted all of my thoughts out. When I finished, I realised that I haven't once asked how he was coping with my depression. It caught him off gaurd, but we were able to have a heart to heart instead of me just venting to him. When we went to bed I fell asleep. I actually fell asleep without having the urge to get out of bed and do a million things! I woke up several times, but was able to stay in bed and relax. When I woke up this morning, I felt good. I didn't feel anger or bitterness. I felt calm and content. I cleared my to-do list that has been collecting dust over the past few months, contacted some friends that I feel like I've been pushing away, and that's enough for me. I don't need to do a million things around the house in order to prove my worth. I'm worthy.
I don't know if this is a good day, or if I'm out of the water, but I want to savor every moment today.
Thanks to everyone for the support. I hope you all are doing good today, or at least better than yesterday.