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Depression Support Center Depression Support Center

Is it selfish of me to feel like this?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 9 Replies
At this moment i feel really unappreciated. Im not wanting gushy gratitude i would just appreciate a heartfelt thank you every once in awhile. The last 3 days i have gone to bed around 3 a.m. and been up by 5:45 getting breakfast for everybody..(6) total, then spending the rest of my day washing clothes, doing dishes, preparing meals, tending to the needs of 2 & 8 yo, refereeing sibling arguments between 16, 14, and 8 yo. We had a family member pass away and i had to get everybody together for that, im suffering from 2 abcessed teeth, a sinus/allergy infection, running on a manic episode, trying to reintegrate my meds into my routine when i sleep im flashing back to my PTSD days wake up crying which seriously affects the 2-2 1/2 rest im getting and yet not one of my family members..dh included...says thank you or can i help you with anything? Not once does anybody offer to change the babys diaper or take her walking..in the midst of dinner prep and cookie baking last night i had to stop and run bath water and bathe her while running to check food they didnt even flinch or bat an eyelash till i started crying. Im just..i dont know..frustrated and tired and hurt and ready to sleep my final sleep.
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 12, 2013 at 12:04 AM
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Replies (1-9):
reindeer-c
by on Feb. 12, 2013 at 4:21 AM

I would loose my mind. You are not selfish at all. You need a break. You should not have to get to the point where you are in tears for your family to notice you need help. I am so sorry. I think sometimes everyone thinks we are to be superwoman and do it all. We are only human. For goodness sake, you are sick and doing all of this stuff for your family and you think you are selfish. I think your family is taking advantage of you. Don't feel guilty. Sit down and take a break before you have a breakdown. You have way too much going on to o it alone. Huge hugs.

lyrick24
by Ruby Member on Feb. 12, 2013 at 6:25 AM

 you def. need some rest and some help. no wonder you feel like you do. sit your family down including your dh and tell them you need some help. get the older kids to help you. let them know how you are feeling. designate responsibilities to all of them. write it down on a poster board if you have to. and if it gets too bad just tell your husband you are taking a walk and walk out the door.

matreshka
by Ruby Member on Feb. 12, 2013 at 7:18 AM

Yep, you need some rest.  I find that thank you's and I'm sorry's come in short supply in my life. I am trying to let it go but it still hurts.

Does anything help to soothe your mania?  Cna anyone help you with the kids?

matreshka
by Ruby Member on Feb. 12, 2013 at 7:19 AM

Oh and to answer your question you are DEFINITELY not selfish.

leahbeah143
by Leah on Feb. 12, 2013 at 9:26 AM

 not selfish at all! you need to sit down and have a talk with your family about stepping up! it sounds like you have a pretty full house, and most of the kids are old enough to help out. DH should also be helping out.

deltathree
by Gold Member on Feb. 12, 2013 at 12:44 PM

This & hugs..... 


Quoting leahbeah143:

 not selfish at all! you need to sit down and have a talk with your family about stepping up! it sounds like you have a pretty full house, and most of the kids are old enough to help out. DH should also be helping out.


 

ruggy03
by on Feb. 12, 2013 at 11:49 PM
Thats the new entitled generation....I had a house full of them till I had to sit them all down hand them their birth certificates and have them read them.after they were done I asked if they saw the word entitlement on their?they all said no so then I explained that from now on they will realize that they are not entitled to anything,and only out of the goodness of my heart have i been killing myself but no more.now everyone has a chore and if its not done it all falls on the person responsible....
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Feb. 13, 2013 at 7:57 AM
Thank you ladies, I truly appreciate your comments.
erikadi
by Member on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:22 AM

I am sorry that you are unappreciated. Sometimes people need you to say I need your help. With your husband tell him you don't want to have to cry to get some help. Then try to tell them exactly what you need. Also try a chore chart, your 8, 14, and 16 year old are old enough to help you.

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