Ugh. My anxiety is getting really bad lately. Right now I know why it is but there is nothing I can do about it. I have a doctors appointment tomorrow with my phyciatrist which is good but I know nothin is going to be done to "help" me right now since I am 31 weeks pregnant. After that I have a meeting with a rental assistance place finally. I have huge anxiety over that. I am hoping and praying they can help with what we still owe for rent for this month but I have learned not toget my hopes up and I have a strong feeling we are going to be denied for one reason or another and have to just deal with it. Thursday I have my first actual therapy appointment which should help some at lead bu we shall see how it goes. I have huge anxiety over friday because idk how much Brian's check is goin to be and we have several things we need to do. If we can't get rental assistance we have to pay our complex $500 or be kicked out so really hoping it is enough to cover the at least if is is and IF we have money left over we the. Have to pay the electric, gas for the car, a few odds and ends we need for he house, and the last minute things needed for the baby shower on Saturday. I am sort of looking forward to saturday but mostly not. I am because of getting to see wha we get for Leon and can plan wha we still need to get. But I am not looking forward to being around 20-30 people having to somehow watch my 1 year old but pay attention to the group and I have to make sure fiancé is good with hosting the games. I am just totally freaking out right now. Plus my mom will be at my shower and she has a tendency to blow little thigs out of proportion so I know if something little happens she is probably goin to ruin it for me. Plus I am 95% sure it's going to be all family there except for 1-2 maybe 3 others (or family friends) since apparently my "friends" can't be bothered to ask for 1 day off of work ge they expect me to always drop everything and do whatever they want to do. I AM looking forward to a meeting I have next week with a local college to see about going back to school but I am hesitant to get my hopes up there either since I seem to just get shut out wih things like his. But I am praying I qualify for some sort of assistance so I can go back to school again.
One of my friends is getting married in June (maybe July but pretty sure it was June) and I am *suppose* to be part of the wedding party however she expects us to buy the dress. No big deal we bought mine for my sisters wedding too the issue wih this wedding is I am the one that has to purchase the dress yet only df is workin right now and we have all of our "normal" bills plus adding another baby to the family which is going to make hints even tighter on us. I *was* planning on using my taxes for the dress however there are other more important thigs hat have come up that I HAVE to do with he tax money. So I will probably have to tell my friend I can be a part of her weddi since I can afford he dress. And I would have to Ty to find someone attending the wedding to watch my 1 year old and newborn while the ceremony is going on. Ugh. There is just so much going on right now and idk what to do really.
on Feb. 12, 2013 at 11:23 PM