Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Depression Support Center Depression Support Center

Would this bother you or am I overreacting?

Posted by on Jun. 21, 2014 at 9:32 PM
  • 12 Replies
We live with my parents due to financi reasons. I have been working an early shift and this afternoon when I got off I was talking to my fiancé who said that my mom td him we had $100 in the car and that I had left it unlocked. This bothers me supper bad because 1. She has zero business being inside of my car for any reason unless she left something in it in accident which she hasn't ridden in it borrowed my car for more them 2 weeks so that feels like a violation I me. And second my car has a cubby in the. Dash board where I had stuck the money last night. So even if she needed something really quick she had to have been actually looking inside the cubby to see the money. Plus I had it fouled in half and wrapped in the receipt from checking out, and I had another paper on top of it that I needed for work. So she had to have actually been lookin inside of the cubby to find it. And she wouldn't have known it was $100 unless she pulls it out and counted it and put it back. So that also bothers me. And if she really thought/felt it was going to get stolen #1 she could have removed it and brought it inside herself and told me about it or #2 she could have old me to bring it in or #3 she could have locked my car herself since my keys are always on the side of the fridge so I they need to they can move my car without having to wake me. It just bothers me that she was even in my car in the first place for no apparent reason, and that she had to have been looking in/around the cubby to find it, then had to pull it out and count it, but still said nothing about it until this morning when she yelled at my fiancé for it... Which he had nothing to do with it anyway.
by on Jun. 21, 2014 at 9:32 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
buckle
by on Jun. 21, 2014 at 11:20 PM

Does she have nothing else to do?  LOL...wow.  I guess you will be locking your car all the time from now on.  Or I guess you could use a mouse trap for holding your hidden money!  

If it bothered me, I would have asked Mom, what did you need in my car?

lexismom90
by Silver Member on Jun. 21, 2014 at 11:25 PM
She was working today so I didn't have the chance to ask. Plus it would probably start an unnecessary fight. He stoped working Friday last week so this whole week she has been home all day and literally on my case about every single little thing. I can't wait for her to go back to work again.

Quoting buckle:

Does she have nothing else to do?  LOL...wow.  I guess you will be locking your car all the time from now on.  Or I guess you could use a mouse trap for holding your hidden money!  

If it bothered me, I would have asked Mom, what did you need in my car?

buckle
by on Jun. 21, 2014 at 11:38 PM

As I tell my kids, it's not what you are saying, it is the tone you are using. 

I can see it starting an argument if you said to your mom:  "What did YOU NEED in MY car?"

But if you said:  "Mom, what did you need in my car?" with a tone of wanting to help, not accuse.

Quoting lexismom90: She was working today so I didn't have the chance to ask. Plus it would probably start an unnecessary fight. He stoped working Friday last week so this whole week she has been home all day and literally on my case about every single little thing. I can't wait for her to go back to work again.
Quoting buckle:

Does she have nothing else to do?  LOL...wow.  I guess you will be locking your car all the time from now on.  Or I guess you could use a mouse trap for holding your hidden money!  

If it bothered me, I would have asked Mom, what did you need in my car?


leahbeah143
by Leah on Jun. 22, 2014 at 12:45 AM
I don't understand why she was flipping out. Was it her money? And like you said, why is she going through your things?

I would be irritated if somebody was hollering at me about ME leaving MY car unlocked with MY money inside. If something happened it would be my own fault
lucy164
by Peggy on Jun. 22, 2014 at 11:17 AM
1 mom liked this

That is one nosy woman.  If I were you I would lock up all personal items and keep the key with you at all times.

bambismom
by Silver Member on Jun. 22, 2014 at 1:00 PM
1 mom liked this

My son moved back in with us and sometimes I feel the urge to "snoop" because we have helped him out so much financially and emotionally.  I do however, resist this urge.  If I came across something really bothersome (accidentally, of course!)  I might say something, but finding $100 in his car?  NO!!  I mean, when somebody is living with you, it's possible to see/hear/find things purely out of accident, but she literally was snooping since she had to do that much digging to find it!!!!  You are NOT overreacting, it is NOT O.K., and I think you have the right to ask her about it.  "Mom, did you forget something in my car?"  See what she says and go from there.  If she fumbles around and won't tell you, well at least you have said to her that you know she was in your car and maybe she'll figure out that she shouldn't do that. 

Dona127
by Member on Jun. 22, 2014 at 1:55 PM
1 mom liked this

 

         I don't think you were over re-acting either!  Your Mom had no reason to be snooping in your car.  I agree with some of the other members request Lock your car from now on.  Then you'll know no one will get in.  It's to bad you can't even trust your Mother!  You have every right to feel the way you do.  Good luck to you in the future!

MissMackiesgg
by Silver Member on Jun. 22, 2014 at 8:05 PM

My feeling is that the car would be locked and the keys with me. If they need to move it, tough turkeys. I would never do that to either of my sons. One lives with me yet because of financial reasons too.

lexismom90
by Silver Member on Jun. 22, 2014 at 8:54 PM
Yeah I have tried that with other things. It always starts out with a flat even and decent tone. But she will keep pushing and saying nasty things until it turns accusing or snappy then all hell breaks loose.

Quoting buckle:

As I tell my kids, it's not what you are saying, it is the tone you are using. 

I can see it starting an argument if you said to your mom:  "What did YOU NEED in MY car?"

But if you said:  "Mom, what did you need in my car?" with a tone of wanting to help, not accuse.

Quoting lexismom90: She was working today so I didn't have the chance to ask. Plus it would probably start an unnecessary fight. He stoped working Friday last week so this whole week she has been home all day and literally on my case about every single little thing. I can't wait for her to go back to work again.

Quoting buckle:

Does she have nothing else to do?  LOL...wow.  I guess you will be locking your car all the time from now on.  Or I guess you could use a mouse trap for holding your hidden money!  

If it bothered me, I would have asked Mom, what did you need in my car?

lexismom90
by Silver Member on Jun. 22, 2014 at 8:56 PM
This is EXACTLY why it is bothering me. Because if something managed to happen to it it would be my own fault.

Quoting leahbeah143: I don't understand why she was flipping out. Was it her money? And like you said, why is she going through your things?

I would be irritated if somebody was hollering at me about ME leaving MY car unlocked with MY money inside. If something happened it would be my own fault
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN