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A year later...

Posted by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 4:34 PM
  • 9 Replies
We've been homeless for a year now. I can't believe it! Here's my last post...
http://mobile.cafemom.com/group/110579/forums/read/18767828/I_need_help

We never got into the shelter, the waiting list was 92 families deep. We left the apartment by getting the national guard to write my husband some orders, the apartment people didn't know what they were looking at, so they let us out of the lease. We dumped most of our things, just keeping clothes and important things like documents.

We moved to California, going to my mother's house, even though she pushes me away she said,"I don't know why you won't let me help you. Just come home."

I was pregnant with my 4th baby, what could I do?

She never told my dad we were coming. She didn't tell her husband that she'd offered to let 5 (about to be 6) people come into their home. It was a shit storm.

I was high risk, and labor started several weeks too early. I was in the hospital constantly. I had him a month early, on Halloween. They took him straight to the nicu. He wasn't breathing. My heart hurt so much, that all the stress I put on him was too much. 2 weeks in the nicu. He has asthma and reflux, but today is a healthy almost 9mo baby.

We still have no where to call home. My parents are still not happy with me. My kids tell me they don't eat enough. They start school Aug 4th, 3 of them now. My E is starting kindergarten! I want to be excited.

I've lost my best friend. This spring, at some point, she and my husband slept together. I've only known about it for a month, and it's still very fresh on my mind. I cut her out completely. I couldn't handle losing my husband. God help me, I need him. But it's still hard. Everyday I have to think about it, and reassure myself that I'm doing the right thing.

I'm going to college again, starting next month. I can't get a job that cover day care, even the gov't help. I'm trying to do better. Husband started school in February and will graduate this March.

We have gone between family members, not staying too long as we don't wear out our welcome. For the next few weeks we will be house sitting for husband's grandparents, so it'll be nice to spread out a bit, cook real food, and hopefully relax.

Anyhow, I thought I'd share my story. I'm still painfully depressed most days. And I don't have any friends whom I can trust. Sorry it's long, I'm a writer.
by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 4:34 PM
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Replies (1-9):
leahbeah143
by Leah on Jul. 23, 2014 at 5:46 PM
Big hugs to you and your family!
bambismom
by Gold Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 6:05 PM

Wow, you have been through so much, and then your husband sleeps with your best friend?  Ouch.  But you have forgiven him, that is good, as long as he is good to you now.  I'm glad you and your husband are going to school, hopefully that helps you both get a job.  I know though how expensive daycare is, how old are your children?  If it's more than two in daycare there probably isn't a job that pays well enough for you to bring much home.  I hope things get better for you. 

hugging(((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))

4Owlets
by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 6:27 PM
They are 10, 7, 5 and 8mo. The 5yo is starting half day kinder, which is only 3 hrs long. Its be very hard. Just trying my best to press forward.

Quoting bambismom:

Wow, you have been through so much, and then your husband sleeps with your best friend?  Ouch.  But you have forgiven him, that is good, as long as he is good to you now.  I'm glad you and your husband are going to school, hopefully that helps you both get a job.  I know though how expensive daycare is, how old are your children?  If it's more than two in daycare there probably isn't a job that pays well enough for you to bring much home.  I hope things get better for you. 


hugging(((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))

diaperstodating
by Bronze Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 6:35 PM
Hugs
bambismom
by Gold Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 7:24 PM

 O.K., so maybe once the 5 year old is in school full time you could work with just the one in daycare.  I often wonder if the full day kindergarten is really beneficial or not.  I watch kids after school (kidstop) the little preschoolers (3 days/week, all day) and kindergartners (5 days a week/ all day)  are sometimes so tired they can't see straight.  I have many a meltdowns with the ones who are 3, 4 or just turned 5.  It's a long day for them. 

Quoting 4Owlets: They are 10, 7, 5 and 8mo. The 5yo is starting half day kinder, which is only 3 hrs long. Its be very hard. Just trying my best to press forward.
Quoting bambismom:

Wow, you have been through so much, and then your husband sleeps with your best friend?  Ouch.  But you have forgiven him, that is good, as long as he is good to you now.  I'm glad you and your husband are going to school, hopefully that helps you both get a job.  I know though how expensive daycare is, how old are your children?  If it's more than two in daycare there probably isn't a job that pays well enough for you to bring much home.  I hope things get better for you. 

hugging(((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))

 

zboys
by Gold Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 10:49 PM

Oh, my!  HUGS

srltb143
by on Jul. 24, 2014 at 12:04 AM

Oh hun, I am so very sorry.  It broke my heart reading this.  = (  I know that sometimes it's overwhelming and that you wonder when things are ever going to get better.  How you try to stay positive for the sake of the kids.  Things WILL get better....this will NOT last forever.  You and your family will get back on your feet.  One of the most important things is that you don't lose hope.  Do you stay home with the kids?  Does hubby work?  You are obviously an extremely strong woman to deal with all that you have had to deal with.  

If you ever need to talk, you can message me.  

lyrick24
by Group Admin on Jul. 24, 2014 at 12:47 AM

 wow! You have been through a lot. I hope things start looking up for you.

4Owlets
by on Jul. 24, 2014 at 12:31 PM
I stay with the kids, and husband goes to school 5 days a week. I'll be doing online school so that I can still be there for the kids.

Sometimes it's very tiring being so "strong" but I do my best and pray not too break.

Thank you.


Quoting srltb143:

Oh hun, I am so very sorry.  It broke my heart reading this.  = (  I know that sometimes it's overwhelming and that you wonder when things are ever going to get better.  How you try to stay positive for the sake of the kids.  Things WILL get better....this will NOT last forever.  You and your family will get back on your feet.  One of the most important things is that you don't lose hope.  Do you stay home with the kids?  Does hubby work?  You are obviously an extremely strong woman to deal with all that you have had to deal with.  

If you ever need to talk, you can message me.  

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