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Should I feel sorry for her?

Posted by on Jan. 14, 2015 at 8:30 PM
  • 8 Replies

So, my oldest son that got divorced has a new friend, a girl.  They seem to get along really well.  My youngest son was telling me that this new friend said something that offended his girlfriend.  O.K., well, not much we can really do and he knows that.  But, I think he thought I should feel sorry for his girlfriend.  I guess I'm not really feeling sorry for her because she doesn't treat my son very well.   Am I wrong?  I mean, if she was always this sweet little thing and always nice to him, I would definitely feel bad.  But, she treats him like crap sometimes and I just want him to know that isn't O.K.  Am I weird?  

 

by on Jan. 14, 2015 at 8:30 PM
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Replies (1-8):
lyrick24
by Group Admin on Jan. 15, 2015 at 2:28 AM
2 moms liked this

 i would try not to have feelings about it one way or the other. that is between the two of them. i wouldnt get involved.

lucy164
by Peggy on Jan. 15, 2015 at 6:13 AM

These are adults that you are talking about, right?  If so, let them work things out among themselves.

Serenity7
by Silver Member on Jan. 15, 2015 at 10:55 AM

 People get offened because of issue within them. Not because of what someone else says or does

captainjack
by Silver Member on Jan. 15, 2015 at 12:11 PM

No its there life let them deal with there friends.

bambismom
by Gold Member on Jan. 15, 2015 at 3:23 PM

I am going to let them deal with it, however, if these two end up being a part of our family and they don't get along, well, it could affect all of us.  Hopefully it doesn't come to that, but, it was the first time they had met, so, that isn't good.   I just want my  son's girlfriends to treat them well.  They say "what goes around comes around."  Well, I just wish my youngest son's girlfriend would treat him better, then maybe I would have more compassion for her when somebody hurts her feelings.  Is that weird?   I mean, when somebody calls my son a dumb ass many times on a daily basis, I just have a hard time feeling sorry for her.  It's getting better, he says, but it's going to have to get a lot better.  He, her sister, and even her parents have made her realize what she is doing.  They really like my son and they don't like how she sometimes treats him either.  I hope that "absence makes the heart grow fonder" with her.  He is done with college but she isn't, so they won't see each other near as much now.  

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Jan. 17, 2015 at 1:48 AM
Did you try talking to the girl about it...And just let her know how u feel and where you stand...You know it doesn't,t hurt to speak up a little bit about it to them...
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 17, 2015 at 7:42 AM

Part of being an adult is learning to make decisions on your own. And you learn by the cause and effect of those decisions.  So I would stay out of it and tell them they are adults.

I know you can see it may blow into something bigger.  And perhaps you can sense that. 

I know you dont want conflict with in the family and want everything to go smoothly.   But in any family I have been apart of sometimes there is conflict and people just need to work thru that.

HE CHOOSES to stay in the relationship, he can leave it at any time.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 17, 2015 at 9:59 AM

I'd be mad at my son for dating this horrible girl in the first place.  I know when my daughter dated this piece of shit guy, I didn't allow him in our house.  I knew he treated her badly and if she wanted to be treated that way, it wouldn't be around us.

What happens between them though is between them.  It's up to your son to demand respect and cut off the relationship if he isn't getting it.  And if this girl is being disrespected by others, then she's probably earned it.

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