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Kids' Health Kids' Health

Birthday Party reciprocity

Posted by on May. 18, 2012 at 7:44 PM
  • 25 Replies

Ok I am getting more steamed by the minute.  Max(pre-k year) went to 6 birthday parties this school year.    6 times I cleared my schedule and changed my plans to take him since at that age parents usually stay the whole time.   That's 6 times I found a sitter for his little brother.  6 times I bought a birthday present for someone elses kid.  So here we are - the night before Max's party - and the only RSVPs I have gotten is 1 yes, 1 no, and 2 maybes out of 24 kids.   I have always operated under the birthday party resiprocity rule that if you want people to come to your kids party, you bad better make sure you had went to theirs.   If only 1 kid shows up I swear we are not going to another kids party until Max is old enough to drive himself there.  Grrrrrrrr, 

by on May. 18, 2012 at 7:44 PM
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Replies (1-10):
IQuitCounting
by on May. 18, 2012 at 8:25 PM

I agree, unless there's a good reason (like work that can't be missed or illness) I expect a tit-for-tat on the birthday goodness.  I go all out on my son's party's and I have friends without kids that still show up and show their love... when someone doesn't they can bet there's a good chance I won't be attending their child's, or we may go so but I won't be spending money on it (I'm not wealthy enough to spend that much to begin with).  Especially if it happens year after year.  

And the RSVP thing ticks me off beause you can't plan if no one tells you a definate answer.  Ugh.

Mipsy
by Bronze Member on May. 18, 2012 at 8:27 PM
Aw I'm sorry. I totally agree about if you invite them you should go to theirs. It's common courtesy, but apparently its not so common.
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new_mom808
by Andrea on May. 18, 2012 at 10:10 PM

I agree w/ the reciprocity. Sadly actually RSVP'ing seems to be a lost courtesy.

TonyaLea
by on May. 18, 2012 at 10:51 PM

I have been feeling pretty bad about that this year actually.  We have two sets of old highschool friends that each have a child my daughter's age.  We all live about an hour apart from eachother.  

Last July for my DD's 3rd birthday we threw her first real B-day party and both sets of friends came.  Well, since then, we were invited to both of theirs too, but one was Thanksgiving weekend (we go out of state for Thanksgiving), and one was on a weekend we had previously planned to visit our parents.  :/  They throw parties every year for their kids though, so we have been to several of theirs, and we have only thrown one of our own, so I try to make myself feel better that we are "even."

karamille
by on May. 18, 2012 at 11:32 PM

Each of these parties had about 8-20 kids show up - except one party.  That one party, Max was the only kid from school came.  You would have thought that they would have RSVP'd but they didn't. 

 

Vertical15
by on May. 19, 2012 at 7:19 AM

RSVPs are just not what they used to be.  People just don't care to respond anymore.  Its unfair to the planner.  I get so frustrated!

I actually gave up and we just do birthdays with family now.

TigerofMu
by Sonja on May. 19, 2012 at 10:41 AM

 That would be frustrating!  I know we try to get to all we can.  We live 50 miles out of town, so sometimes it's a struggle to get in and get presents, then go, but we always let them know if for some reason we're not able to get there.

deedee3849
by on May. 19, 2012 at 2:27 PM

Yeah, that's why we have family birthday parties lol. I know who's coming.

karamille
by on May. 19, 2012 at 4:49 PM

We he ended up with 8 kids there.  3 RSVP'd this morning, and one showed up withour RSVP'ing at all.  They have a great time.  We did a pirate theme and did a recreation of the Disney World "league of pirates" make-over. 

new_mom808
by Andrea on May. 19, 2012 at 6:42 PM


Quoting Vertical15:

RSVPs are just not what they used to be.  People just don't care to respond anymore.  Its unfair to the planner.  I get so frustrated!

I actually gave up and we just do birthdays with family now.

Yea, I've been frusterated w/ the lack of RSVPs too. I follow up w/ a phone call, FB message etc. If you cant respond, I'll just stalk you. LOL.

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