hitting

[meagn3388]

How do I constructively get my daughter not to hit without yelling at her? Lately she's been doing this a lot & also pulling hair. I want her to stop doing it but idk the right way to go about it. Any advice?

[TerriC]

How old is she? There are different bargaining tools depending on age. Lol

[auntangelofsix]

my 8 month old on tues does it too.

[new_mom808]

 How old is she?
What have you tried so far? Why/ When does she hit?

[Vertical15]

Like the ladies said it depends on her age.  With younger ones its best just to remove them from the situation.

[meagn3388]

She's 14 months on Saturday.

[meagn3388]

She does it randomly. I tell her to stop and she won't and sometimes I'll raise my voice and then she starts to cry. I end up feeling bad so I hug her and kiss her.

[TerriC]

Just try to be stearn about what you are telling her.  I know how hard it is when they cry though...lol.  It is most likely a phase given her age, but stick to your guns and let her no that NO means NO!  =-)

Quoting meagn3388:

She does it randomly. I tell her to stop and she won't and sometimes I'll raise my voice and then she starts to cry. I end up feeling bad so I hug her and kiss her.

[meagn3388]

You're right. I think she's starting to realize that if she cries she'll get sympathy. She's a smarty lol. I'm just going to have to put my foot down.

[mickstinator]

My son is getting into this phase as well. He'll be 2 next month. It's really frustrating. The hair pulling hurts so much that it's hard to keep my cool and think clearly for a good response. 

I've been holding his hand very tightly (not painful, but a little uncomfortable), looking him in the eyes, and speaking very clearly and calmly. "No, we do not hit/pull hair/bite (whatever have you). _____ing is mean. We do not ______." 

Eventually, they do grow out, especially if you address it every time it happens. It's hard when they are so little that you're not sure if they even fully understand the admonishment, but over time, I think it's effective. We just can't expect them to adjust overnight. I forget that sometimes, too! 

[new_mom808]

 This was pretty much what we did. They do grow out of it.

Quoting mickstinator:

My son is getting into this phase as well. He'll be 2 next month. It's really frustrating. The hair pulling hurts so much that it's hard to keep my cool and think clearly for a good response. 

I've been holding his hand very tightly (not painful, but a little uncomfortable), looking him in the eyes, and speaking very clearly and calmly. "No, we do not hit/pull hair/bite (whatever have you). _____ing is mean. We do not ______." 

Eventually, they do grow out, especially if you address it every time it happens. It's hard when they are so little that you're not sure if they even fully understand the admonishment, but over time, I think it's effective. We just can't expect them to adjust overnight. I forget that sometimes, too!