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Weight Loss, Fitness & Health Weight Loss, Fitness & Health

No support!! :(

Posted by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 12:38 AM
  • 24 Replies
I normally do my workouts at night because its much easier when my ds is asleep and my dh is at work. My dh has been off since Friday night and doesn't go back till Wednesday night. Well when I try to exercise my dh rolls his eyes and gets irritated when I won't go to bed with him because I want to work out. I can't even cook like I want because he refuses to eat any type of veggies other than corn. I have a hard enough time keeping motivated and it just make it even harder with absolutely no support. I guess I really don't have a question other than has anyone ever been in my situation? How did you deal with it? I'm only a couple weeks into my weight loss journey and already feel like I want to give up.
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by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 12:38 AM
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Replies (1-10):
sweetmomma326
by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 1:45 AM

I have the same problem!  Don't let little issues like the cooking get into your way of achieving.  I have learned to cook my own meals and freeze them so I can just cook whatever they want and I can enjoy my stuff while they enjoy theirs.

opal10161973
by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 1:48 AM
2 moms liked this

Cook whatever you want, if DH doesn't like it, he can cook for himself.  Let him roll his eyes and then do whatever you need to.  It's not about him, this is about you. 

musicpisces
by Suzanne on Feb. 5, 2013 at 2:59 AM

I agree- focus on YOU and YOUR health.  He'll be glad you took care of yourself when he is dealing with health issues later, and you're able to take care of him.  And perhaps he'll wish he'd jumped on board.

Make what YOU are going to make, and he can either eat it like a big boy or whine like a baby and starve or make his own food.  My hubby whines, too, and literally lives on strawberry yogurt and Diet Coke.  We've argued about it a hundred times.  He knows how I feel, and I don't even bother anymore.  But I make ONE meal, and he can choose to eat it or not.  I usually try to go with something I know he likes, or make something he doesn't like if we have leftovers of something I know he does like.  But it's always healthy (or at least 95% of the time).

Suzanne

"Don't sacrifice what you want most for what you want right now."

musicpisces
by Suzanne on Feb. 5, 2013 at 3:01 AM
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Also, I know how it feels when they aren't supportive of the workouts.  It wears on you.  Have you talked to him about it?  Even just saying something like, "Whether or not you agree with it, just be supportive.  'Yes dear' goes a long way."  I had to remind DH of that for my race Sunday. He just doesn't get it.  He's never been athletic (he used to golf- I don't think that's particularly athletic compared to triathlon and running, but whatever), so he doesn't get it.  He doesn't understand why it means what it does to me to get in my workouts.  I have a really strong family history of heart disease and dying young, and it scares the hell out of me.  He doesn't have that.

Suzanne

"Don't sacrifice what you want most for what you want right now."

mjgm1966
by Bronze Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 3:55 AM
2 moms liked this

 Girl,

Take a deep breath, and re-group.  My husband wan't on board with my new way of eating--at first.  I'd cook him and the kids one thing, and myself something else.  After about a year, and me losing about 30 pounds doing this--he happily jumped on board.  He started eating healthy with me this January and ended up losing 10 pounds in one month.  Now, instead of rolling his eyes at me, he encourages me.  And if I want to get off the path and go out to eat--it's him who talks me out of it.  You hang in there and do this for you! Try not to get discouraged.  Get your support from here!  This is the perfect place for it!

Smiles!!!!

Hunnybadgerkins
by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:29 AM
I agree.

Quoting opal10161973:

Cook whatever you want, if DH doesn't like it, he can cook for himself.  Let him roll his eyes and then do whatever you need to.  It's not about him, this is about you. 

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funny_girl3
by New Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 8:00 AM

Don't give up!  My husband is not very helpful with my weight loss either, he tolerates it as long as it's not inconvenient to him.  I used to cook for my husband, now I cook for both of us.  Example:  he hates broccoli but I love it, but I never cooked it because he didn't like it, now I cook two veggies, one for him and one for me and the kids usually have a little bit of both.

mcginnisc
by Claire on Feb. 5, 2013 at 8:27 AM
1 mom liked this

Do not give up. You have to realize that you are worth being healthy and happy. Your daughter is worth having a healthy mother. Period. 

Continue with your workouts. Everyone in your family ( including him) will benefit from you having more energy and better heart health from working out. 

As far as meals go- do not waver. He is a grown man, with 2 arms, 2 legs, 10 fingers and 10 toes. He is perfectly capable of making himself something else if he does not like the meal you prepare. You make a healthy meal and he can choose as an adult to eat it or not. However, if he chooses to eat something else, he will be setting a poor example for your daughter. You can always makeover things that he does like. There are ways to make things healthier and appealing to those that are resistant. 

For example, I make turkey meatloaf and load it with veggies. My kids loathe veggies, but they will devour the meatloaf even being able to see the veggies in it. I also have 2 veggies instead of a starch. Very seldomly do we eat rice or another grain. Has your husband tried other veggies cooked in different ways? Roasting veggies makes them sweeter as it brings out the natural sugars. My kids actually like roasted parsnips and carrots as they are sweet and we eat them in place of fries. I make mashed cauliflower instead of potatoes. You can puree veggies and put them into sauces, so he will not even know he is eating veggies. 

You can do this! Belive in yourself and know that you are worth it. 

Claire


" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Phillipians 4:13 

mummyLauano
by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 9:26 AM
yep I agree!!


Quoting musicpisces:

Also, I know how it feels when they aren't supportive of the workouts.  It wears on you.  Have you talked to him about it?  Even just saying something like, "Whether or not you agree with it, just be supportive.  'Yes dear' goes a long way."  I had to remind DH of that for my race Sunday. He just doesn't get it.  He's never been athletic (he used to golf- I don't think that's particularly athletic compared to triathlon and running, but whatever), so he doesn't get it.  He doesn't understand why it means what it does to me to get in my workouts.  I have a really strong family history of heart disease and dying young, and it scares the hell out of me.  He doesn't have that.


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CorpCityGrl
by Bronze Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 9:34 AM

Don't give up!  Focus on YOU and YOUR HEALTH.

It's tough when your spouse doesn't support you.  My own DH is like that.  However, you have to push through for yourself and to show him that you CAN do it.  I actually spoke to DH about it when I would hear the comments or see the eye rolls.  Once he saw how hurt I was and how important getting healthy was to me, he slowly got on board.  If your DH won't eat the food, don't stop cooking it...just keep doing what you're doing and he'll come around or it'll force him to start being more resourceful and helping you out.  You are not just doing a yo-yo diet thing, but changing your lifestyle for the better and sometimes those around us don't understand it until they start seeing for themselves the difference these changes are making.

Also consider getting on line on to a community to find support from those who are also on a weight loss journey.  You'd be surprised at how much this helps.  You can log on to http://beachbodycoach.com/RoseAnn1130 and sign up for free and get on to the boards and talk to others.

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