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The Park Bench The Park Bench

At 40, how do you make friends?

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It seemed easier making friends when you are younger.  I thought that once you get in your 40's that  'ways you feel about yourself '  wouldn't get in the way of making friends. Does anyone feel the same way?

 

by on Apr. 28, 2012 at 3:30 PM
Replies (41-50):
Mamagoogins
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 10:49 AM
3 moms liked this

Sadly momma22cuties, what you intended to be a way of reaching out and getting help ended up with one individual being exactly the type of person that probably  makes you afraid to go out and make friends.  We are not all that way and when you run into those women who are vocal about you or how you run your life, you just walk away from that relationship.  You can make friends and there are many different ways you can do that.  Find something small that makes you comfortable and work from there.  If you make one really great friend, it will be worth it.   

momma22cuites
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 1:09 PM

 I really appreciate all the help I am getting. It is helping me to feel a little more confident to, step out of my comfort zone , reading all this thoughtful advice. Little did I know putting this post out there, I would have so many people (I don't even know) routing for me.  Thanks again :)

thedahliascene
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 1:42 PM

i find that after my college graduation it was a lot harder to make friends. there weren't as many places to meet them outside of work, but it was even harder considering that i lived in los angeles. i think all in all it's about finding a hobby that you enjoy and meeting people through it.

hopealways4019
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 5:37 PM
The best friendships are the friends, you meet in high school, college. Unfortunately I have no friends.
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momma22cuites
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:33 PM

 I found a christian group on here and I am going to check it out. Thanks for all the great advice about finding what you like or comfortable with and go from there.  Support and Encouragement goes a long way!!!!!!!!

Browncoat4eva
by on May. 1, 2012 at 2:03 AM


Quoting momma22cuites:

 I found a christian group on here and I am going to check it out. Thanks for all the great advice about finding what you like or comfortable with and go from there.  Support and Encouragement goes a long way!!!!!!!!

That's wonderful; I'm sure if you really give it some effort you'll find the friendships you're looking for. You sound like such a sweet person, I can't imagine anyone not counting themselves lucky if they had you as a friend.

Peace, and all that jazz...


~Mackenzie 


a Browncoat4eva 


...I'm a leaf on the wind. Watch me soar...

momma22cuites
by on May. 1, 2012 at 11:17 AM

 

Quoting Browncoat4eva:


Quoting momma22cuites:

 I found a christian group on here and I am going to check it out. Thanks for all the great advice about finding what you like or comfortable with and go from there.  Support and Encouragement goes a long way!!!!!!!!

That's wonderful; I'm sure if you really give it some effort you'll find the friendships you're looking for. You sound like such a sweet person, I can't imagine anyone not counting themselves lucky if they had you as a friend.

Oh wow. That is such a nice thing to say. And you hit the nail right on the head , I have to 'give it some effort'.  Thanks so much for your post :)

HTMommy
by on May. 1, 2012 at 11:31 AM

This is beyond true and it has nothing to do with age! I'm in my late 20's with 3 boys aged 9, 6, and 3. I have had such a hard time making "mommy" friends because alot more often than not they look down on me because I am the youngest and have more kids than they do. They tend to think because I am younger than they are, I have nothing to offer and no life experience. Oh boy are they sadly mistaken. It is very hard to make friends, regardless of age, but I think once we can all get past the age issues that alot of us tend to have, its easier.

Quoting greenmachine47:

I'm an older mom in my 40's with a 4 yr old. We joined a playgroup at the clubhouse at my park and I do find it harder to make friends at times. It seems the moms all knew each other and had formed their own alliance group. last week some of the moms started \talking to me more.


HTMommy
by on May. 1, 2012 at 11:34 AM

Thats not always true, you can meet people in adult life that become integral parts of your life and can become best friends. I have watched my mom create lasting best friendships as an adult without ever knowing them from highschool or college.

Quoting hopealways4019:

The best friendships are the friends, you meet in high school, college. Unfortunately I have no friends.


HTMommy
by on May. 1, 2012 at 11:40 AM
1 mom liked this

I think that you need to figure out what you want and where you can get what you want. Do you like to make things. Do you really want "friends" Some people say they want friends, but then when it comes down to it, to meeting or hanging out, they make excuses and never get around to it or have time for "friends" Are you more content to be alone and do things solitarily and just like the idea of friendly companionship? I'm not trying to be rude, but its a legitimate question. If you like to do things like crafting, there are "How-to's" at craft stores and on weekends home remodeling stores have do it yourself workshops. If you like to read, head to the book store search online for a local book club. I promise  you, that no matter what you are into there is a group somewhere of like minded people that like to do it also, its just a matter of making contacts and getting out there to find people of like mindedness to make potential friends.

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