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poll: if you are home with your kids and in laws live close by, how often, if ever, do you bring your kids to them for visits without your hubby?

Posted by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 2:09 PM
  • 5 Replies
I think most often the grandkids spend more time with the moms family than the dad' is just what comes more naturally. I love my in laws, but I cannot help but desire to be around my family and be more comfortable with my own family.

I am curious to see how common or not this is. :-)
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 2:09 PM
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by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 6:11 PM

My in-laws are 5 hours away and my parents are an hour away, so obviously we see my parents more often.  But if my in-laws lived close to us, I would have no problem going to see them with DH.

by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 8:54 PM

Well, first of all, my kids couldn't be around my mom because my mom is clinically insane and dangerous for them. She treated my daughter better than my son, both were her blood grand kids.

Second, we offered to spend more time with my MIL when we stopped spending every Friday with her parents as was the tradition. They died. She rebuffed us. I rarely see her especially if I can help it. She's the type to complain about grand kids and kids behind their backs. Now, I'd prefer that to bitching to my face but I still am not courting that. To her and my FIL's credit they have treated both our kids exactly the same even though my son is her blood and my daughter is not.

I'd rather spend time with people who enjoy me and my kids or alone.

OTOH, they are all much closer to the grand kids they complained about and which my husband's brother forced on them for babysitting and all.

My ex, was a toxic, insane person. While together I was very happy to spend time with his mom and step dad. In fact, I fit in better with his entire family than he did. However, I felt I needed to keep my distance when he left me so they'd pick him as they should.

Occasionally I'd hear something like he wouldn't let them take our child to their church. I'd offer them that and they'd say something like, "You want us to watch the baby?" No. I was offering you something you want out of the goodness of my heart. I'm not trying to use you.

When he died, we got closer again but they still took any offers as us asking them to babysit which we weren't doing so the kids didn't spend as much time with them as they could without that assumption.

Eventually they wanted to spend time with their grandchild but she, having been very damaged by their child, was uncomfortable doing that without her brother who was not their blood child. So they said he could come along. Over all they've spent the most time with them because, eventually they sought that out. They've been the best grandparents to both our kids.

by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 1:56 PM
All my in laws are in another state. However if bean ever wants to talk and daddy is not around I call. They have the ability to have constant contact with him. Also I am friends with them all on Facebook. They come out to visit and we all hangout. We all get along and have never had issues.
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by on Apr. 6, 2013 at 10:43 AM


by on Apr. 7, 2013 at 12:48 AM

Well my in-laws live an hour from us, and until last week we didn't have a car that ran well enough (it was 15 years old, we just bought a new car) for us to go over to visit them frequently. We went over last weekend to stay while my DH was out on a job (he's an oilfield worker) because our son had begged to go see them. I figured, new car, why not, I don't mind the drive (DH later joined us when he finished the job). But our son is special needs and my in-laws are not the most understanding, especially MIL, she constantly nitpicks at him, mostly for the stupidest things. I get sick of it, DH gets sick of it, even FIL gets sick of it. So DH and I limit the visits. If it weren't for that, yeah, I'd probably take him to see them more often.

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