everyone i need some help....

Replies:

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• by
  • Reyamydawson
  on Nov. 4, 2009 at 9:21 AM

• It's hard at times, and, depending on your job, you will be away from her a lot..... it's ultimately a decision only you can make. As a mom, I couldn't do it, but I stay home with my kids so I'm with them every day all day. on the other hand, I think the military is a great "business opportunity"! and if you enlisted for four years, you could reenlist or you could just get out after that and your whole life is still ahead of you.... it's not like you are signing your entire life away ya know? I will say though, my husband joining the military was BY FAR the best decision he ever made for our family and we will be a military family until they decide not to pay us anymore. :) Good luck!
  

• 
• by
  • sdwyer
  on Nov. 4, 2009 at 2:07 PM

•  I also agree that joining the military would be way too hard for me because I'm just not that tough lol.  I personally couldn't be away from my kids that long.  However, if it is really something you are considering than it doesn't hurt to go talk to a recruiter to get more information.  One thing you should know is if you're a single mom and you're not married you will have to sign custody of your daughter over to someone.  My friend back home joined the Air Force in April and she signed custody over to her parents while she went to basic and tech.  After she was assigned to her base after tech school her parents gave custody back to her.  One thing though she did have to put in her living will is that if anything happened to her, her parents would get custody again.  She had to do this because of deployments because at some point EVERYONE will get deployed.  My friend was away from her daughter for a total of 18 weeks with basic and tech school.  She said it was hard to be away that long, but she was still glad she did it because it is going to better both their lives.  If your family is supportive and you're a strong person then I think you should be fine.  Your daughter is also still real young so it's better to do it now if you're really going to because she won't remember you leaving.  She may not understand at first where mommy is, but if you leave her with people you trust she should be fine. Like I said before though, a recruiter can really tell you about all the technical stuff.  My husband and I absolutely LOVE the Air Force!  He is not a big fan of his job, but he's cross training right now so he'll be in another job by the end of next summer.  He joined because he really didn't know what else he wanted to do with his life and it was the best decision he ever made!  You can't beat the benefits, they're amazing!  Healthcare, housing, a stable paycheck...what could be better than that?  He just reenlisted for another 5 yrs 10 months.  We've decided to take the career route also because in today's economy it's hard to have stability and that's one of the great things the military offers. 

  ~~Steph~~ 

  
  

   

• 
• by
  • Kim508
  on Nov. 4, 2009 at 5:27 PM

• Hi:

  It is a very difficult decision that only you can make.  However, I think your daughter would be very proud of your decision to join the military.  You should not feel bad and should follow your heart.  You are lucky to have a great support system.

  You will have opportunities and benefits that others only dream of.  My son is 20 so I can't say I know how you feel.  He graduated from Basic in August and is now in Tech School in San Angelo Tx.  He should be home around 12/11 and then two weeks later he goes to his first base in Anchorage Alaska - he is a firefighter (aka: Fire Dog).  He got married right before Basic Training. If they didn't then they could not be together when he was stationed.  Since they got married first, they will have a two bedroom house on base in Alaska.

  His young wife is very supportive and we all could not be more proud. Most importantly, he is very proud of himself.  He has accomplished things he never thought he would.  If you are going to do it - this is the time to do it - while she is still young.  I can tell you my son loves every minute of it and even enjoyed Basic Training.  Now, he is top in his class and having "a blast".

  Basic Training is difficult because calls are few and far between but I did receive a ton of letters and wrote to him everyday.  Once that's over - and you go to Tech School - things are much different.  We now speak every day and text each other every night.  We each have a web-cam so we get to see him at least once a week that way (best thing we ever did).

  I don't know if any of this helps but I truly hope so.  You are a strong bright young woman with a great future - regardless of what your decision is.  Your daughter is very lucky.

  Take care and good luck.

  Kim

• 
• by
  • jmsmith
  on Nov. 5, 2009 at 11:55 AM

• Clarisa, I have to agree with the others that this is a decision that you will have to make. It really helps that you seem to have very strong support from your family and fiance. That will help your daughter also.

  The other ladies have given you some wonderful advice. I was raised by two parents that were in the AF and my siblings and I had a wonderful childhood. We got to live in some really great places and even though our parents were both working it never seemed like we missed out. They are wonderful people and we are a very close family.

  I know being a mother you can't help but think about the time you will have to spend away from your daughter. My daughter had some young women in basic , and tech school that had young children and said it seemed pretty tough for them at times. But you have to remember that this is just a short period. 

  I would take the first step and go speak to a recruiter. That will really help with your final decision. Good luck in whatever you choose to do.

  Jeriann 

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• by
  • ARMYBRATAFMOM
  on Nov. 6, 2009 at 9:40 AM

• My dad served in the Army for 20 years and was a Vietnam veteran.  I can tell you that I would not change my military childhood.  We were stationed in Alabama, Georgia, Arizona, Germany, Italy, Belgium...   I speak three languages fluently and participated in many different sports and activities at the tean clubs on base.  All these things I took for granted are things I cannot offer my own children in civilian life.  It may be hard at times to be away from your little one, but if it's something you really want to do, your child will be just as proud of you as I am of my father, my brother and my son.

• 
• by
  • inluvwitaairman
  on Nov. 10, 2009 at 11:57 PM

• I think you should join. My sister-in-law is active duty air force and she loves it. Her son is 2 years old. She joined the medical field cause they do not deploy unless volunteer. They are currently stationed in England and go traveling with their son all the time.

• 
• by
  • wendy6832
  on Nov. 11, 2009 at 9:09 PM

• The Air Force rocks. You'll love it. Keep in touch with us and let us know what you end up doing! The Air Force will help you put family first which is awesome.
  

• 
• by
  • Reyamydawson
  on Nov. 16, 2009 at 12:17 AM

• 
  

  Quoting inluvwitaairman:
  
  

  I think you should join. My sister-in-law is active duty air force and she loves it. Her son is 2 years old. She joined the medical field cause they do not deploy unless volunteer. They are currently stationed in England and go traveling with their son all the time.

  
  Not all people in the medical field do not deploy unless they volunteer. I have a friend whose husband has deployed a few times without volunteering. Just know that the military needs people to deploy and fight for our country.... in the military YOU WILL deploy at some time (unless you are super lucky or sick or something). I mean think about it.... what is the military all about??? can you really expect to stay in the states forever and never fight in a war? I think you should go into it knowing that at some point in your life, you will be deployed... don't expect to never have to fight IN THE MILITARY!

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