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Airforce Mom - trying to adjust
posted to General Discussion
in Air Force Wives and Moms
on Jun. 27, 2009 at 8:03 PM
- 23 Replies
- 345 Total Views
Hi:
Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can get through this. My son left for Lackland Airforce base for Basic Training 3 days ago. It seems like a lifetime. I miss him so much. I can not stop crying wondering if he is Ok. I can get get these horrible visions from my mind. I have not slept all week. He called when he arrived but is was just a script that he had to read. He called again today with another script just stating his mailing address. Both calls were very cold and did not sound like my full of life son. His graduation will be in 8 weeks - it may as well be an eternity for me. I thought I was prepared. We spent the last few months making memories and doing special things together. I thought that would make it easier...I was wrong. I feel as though my heart has been ripped from me. Like a piece of me is missing. I do not know what to do or how to get through this.
Please help me. I feel like I am losing my mind. I am so very proud of him for surving his country and wanting to make a better life for himself. I really wish I could feel better about all of this or it is going to be a very long 2 months.
Sincerely,
Kim
Replies:
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- by on Jun. 28, 2009 at 9:38 AM
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the first scripted phone calls are very very tough. he will get more later on that will be better. write to him everyday...he will LOVE to read what you have to say. It will make his days much better. He is in good hands. As time goes on it really does get easier. After about 3 weeks you will of course still miss him, but you will have more of a scheduled busy routine for yourself you need to keep up with. good luck! he will be done before you know it
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- by on Jun. 28, 2009 at 8:36 PM
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Thank you so much for the support. I was feeling so alone - until now. I really appreciate it.
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- by on Jun. 29, 2009 at 9:06 AM
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Big hugs to you momma!!
I can only imagine what it is like to let your son go and not know exactly what is happening during that time. But know that you raised him well and that he is strong and capable enough to get through anything that comes his way.
Momma, he is ok. Those horrible thoughts that you are having are just a mom's worry. He is getting trained by the best people who are there to help him. It may not seem like it at first but his TI's are there to help him adjust to his "new" life and become a part of the team. The first phone calls are always scripted...keeping it short and to the point. If your son doesn't sound like himself it's because he's trying to adjust to how things are done. The first week or two is a real adjustment and so he may feel just a little lost. But soon enough he finds his "groove" and will be fine.
In the meantime...write letters to him!! He will love it when mail time comes and there is a letter from momma! The letters will let him know that he isn't forgotten (as if that could happen) and are a little pick me up. He'll appreciate it a lot.
Soon you will also get into your own routine and it will be a little easier...just ask the other mom's on here. Of course spend time on here letting us all know how you are doing...we're all here to help.
Hang in there momma...the time will go by fast!
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- by on Jun. 29, 2009 at 6:55 PM
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Thank you so much. Your words are very comforting to me. This website has been a god-send for me. Without it, I do not know what I would do. People like you are helping me through this very difficult time. I miss him so much. We received his address on Saturday and I sent him letters on Saturday, Sunday and Monday so far - with one ready to go out tomorrow. I intend to write every day - even if I just tell him about my day (which is quite boring without him around).
Again, I can not thank you enough for taking the time to make me feel better.
I will keep in touch.
Kim
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- by on Jun. 29, 2009 at 7:03 PM
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Kim ,
You've gotten some great encouragement already, but I wanted to mention to not be surprised when he tells you how much he hates it. They are tearing him down to reuild him. He's going to be very tired and sore from the physical training. It's all worth it when you go to Lackland to see him in his blues! By the way, pack some of his favorite foods with you to take to graduation. He's going to eat like he hasn't eaten before!!!!!
You CAN and WILL get through this! You can private message any of us if you need/want to. It's hard! Just keep writing!
Claudia
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- by on Jun. 30, 2009 at 3:36 PM
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Your son will be very safe there! I think that I would worry more if he was away at school or something where he could be doing anything with anybody! :o) He has someone telling him what to do every moment of every day pretty much, so he can't get in too much trouble! It may be hard on him, but he will be a better man when he gets out, and like I said...he is safe! Don't know if this makes you feel better or not...but hang in there! You will see him on the other side of this, and he will be great!
Mommy to two sweet girls AND
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- by on Jun. 30, 2009 at 3:49 PM
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Hi Claudia:
Thanks so much. I can not lie. When he tells me he hates it - it will break my heart. But at least I can tell him "everyone does but just hang in there a little longer". Great idea about the snacks...I will definetly do that !
I am trying to be strong but I get the feeling he is much stronger (I hope) than I am.
Kim
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- by on Jun. 30, 2009 at 3:51 PM
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Hi:
Thank you for the encouraging words. I never thought of it that way. You are totally right. I have not heard from him in a week (seems like an eternity). I can not wait until I hear from him so I can update all of you. Everyone here is so terrfic and caring. This is literally getting me through each day.
Kim
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- by on Jul. 1, 2009 at 11:12 PM
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I big hug for you.
You will get through this time and you will feel better. What helped me when my son was at BMT were women from this group, writing letters to my son every day, knowing it was ok to cry and doing research on the internet. Oh, and planning our trip to the graduation ceremony at Lackland. The Air Force will take good care of your son, they are a very smart and capable bunch!
This does change your life. I have a new perspective that has taken me to unhappy places but also very happy and good places. I've started a new company because of my experience.
Your son will be ok. You will be ok. I really wish I could give you a hug because I know what a broken heart feels like.
Take care and keep in touch.
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- by on Jul. 2, 2009 at 9:31 AM
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Hi:
Thank you so much. I will consider myself hugged by you. I work in Human Resources and interviewed a candidate yesterday (who we are planning to hire) that was a Staff Sargent for the Air Force and went to BMT at Lackland. He shared so much with me and made me feel so much better about everything. He told me exactly what AJ has gone through and would be going through in the coming weeks. I plan to post the information here for others as it was so helpful to me.
I just hope to hear his voice or receive a letter from him soon. I am so proud of him for making this decision. I am blessed to be his mom...I always have been. More importantly, I told him this daily.
Thanks again for everything. I will keep you posted.
Warm regards,
Kim
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