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Are any of your DH stay at home dads?

Posted by on Dec. 26, 2010 at 8:58 AM
  • 6 Replies

I am the bread winner as a playground sales representative and consultant...I work anywhere from forty to sixty hours a week  or more depending on the time of year and travel with my job. We have six boys still at home and a small hobby farm of my animals.

Do any of you have stay at home husbands? Do they step up and help with the housework? Do you get flack from family about them being at home? Tell me how it works in your house.

by on Dec. 26, 2010 at 8:58 AM
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AutymsMommy
by Member on Dec. 26, 2010 at 9:05 AM

No. I am a stay at home mother. We believe in traditional gender and marriage roles.

I am a Private School sending, Vaccinating, Non spanking, Nightmare Cuddling, Dessert Giving, Homework Helping, Bedtime Kissing, Book Reading, Academic pushing Mother. I believe in the benefit of organized after school activities. I believe in spoiling my children. I believe that I have seen the village and I do not want it raising my child - I will do that, Thank You. I believe that a woman's place is in the home taking care of her house, children and husband. My husband is head of my home. I am a proud Roman Catholic, as is my husband.             Aimee




 

danadanielle
by on Dec. 26, 2010 at 9:20 AM

We are actually contemplating this. How has it worked for you so far? I believe it's best for the person who is bringing in the most income to work and the other one to stay home. I mean it's really whatever works for your family. Do you like the arrangement? I know my family will have a lot to say, but we just have to do what makes sense for us.

harmony7
by on Dec. 26, 2010 at 9:29 AM

I did also believ in more traditional roles especially as a pentacostal christian  and a mother of seven bio children I stayed at home until my boys started school. I also believe as you do AutymsMommy  that it is our job to raise our children,  but I do spank, we did have a family bed, I breast fed for fifteen years....We have been married thirty one years and I have worked out of the home the last ten of these...The job I have now opened up and I felt led to take it...looking back  I see why  but it was intended as a short term job to help us get on our feet but it turned into so much more. My dh was an alcoholic for many years. When he sobered up he needed an avenue to heal his relationship with the children and our role reversal provided that. He has been able to be there through their anger and their pain and worked out love and hope in their hearts. He really had no clue how difficult the road was going to be and how deep the hurt but he made a committment to be there and be available for them. He does take the boys from time to time and do an installation job for me if I need them too. He and the children travel with me if I am out of town during times the boys are out of school. We since have adopted three little boys who were abused by a horrible step dad and grandparents and even mom...He is able to show these little guys that men can be safe and it is okay to be one. So for us it has been more of a calling..and truthfully he is just Flat Better with all these teenage boys then I am...I think they are aliens in my babies bodies..He can relate, love on and play with them in a way I cant. The kids age in range from thirty to ten...and when a couple of the older ones were jogging down a bad path through relationship with Dad and his showing God to them they have turned their lives around and our family is much closer for it.

harmony7
by on Dec. 26, 2010 at 9:36 AM

For us it works wonderfully...I miss being at home sometimes but I have liberal leave and can take off and go to school functions and doctors appointments etc as long as my work is done. I make so much more money then he ever could. He worked in construction for years and we all know how that has tanked...truthfully I make a lot of money and even though things are not the most important in life it is nice to have a home of our own and be able to pay the bills.

He does get the boys to school and does all the running after school He does the dentist appointments, takes left home lunches to school etc. I cook for the most part but he keeps the kitchen clean and the laundry done. He does the yard work and keeps the cars going. WE have found that with teenagers they Need that person home even more then they did when they were younger. It has made us a VERY close family with a Very involved Dad. We are the house to hang out at..other teenagers seek him out for advice so he mentors many many children. We still share responsibility with discipline and we sometimes disagree but he has the final say so as he is with them the most. We discuss large purchases together we make major decisions. It just really really works for us...I am type A and very very hyper and can over react ...not him he is the calm in my storm.

NaturalMommy10
by on Dec. 26, 2010 at 9:46 AM

I do believe in traditional roles in the home (that God has set things to work in a specific order) but I don't think it is wrong either to have a SAHD instead of mom.  I see where it can cause problems in the marriage and areas that the children can lack just because men are not designed to function the same way that women are but again, not that it is wrong.  If that works for your family, then great.  Each family works differently and as long as the children are being raised by their parents and not everyone else BUT, have at it : )

jenbscott
by on Dec. 26, 2010 at 10:06 AM
My husband is a SAHD and I'm working fulltime and doing school fulltime. We don't want me to be working but dh has been unable to find work for a while. There is NO way we could survive anymore so I HAD to get a job. It's so hard. Plus, I have four young kids. My oldest is in Kindergarten and my youngest is 10 weeks old.

As soon as he finds I job, I'm going back to being a SAHM just the way we like it. Well, at least until I finish with school.

Oh, and did I mention that dh is a terrible house husband(lol, I tease him about being a house husband since I'm not a house wife, hahahaha)? I love him to death but he SUCKS at keeping up the house. When I come home it's like a train passed through.
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