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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Worth the Arguement?

Posted by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 5:42 PM
  • 14 Replies
I posted on my FB status today that I would be playing the wii in hopes of beating some of my hubbys top scores. Already in the last week my mother has had an arguement with Hubby, and he just backed away from it. Well she commented that "he's and addict! He constatntly plays and doesn't parent". In reality, he doesn't play all the time and more than 99% of the time we are playing together. He just beats me and has higher scores. He is an amazing Father to our beautiful 4 month old(as of today :D). And he has changed in a lot of ways that most people haven't seen because we live over 1000 miles from home.
Hubby saw the comment she left and simply responded that he didn't play all the time. I texted him and he said that it was okay and it didn't bother him...but its not okay and it did bother me.

My mother has been after us getting a divorce since before we even got married. She didn't even go to our wedding. Instead she went on a physco breakdown and left me at fault for it. I have never said anything about Hubby being a bad parent, I have never said that I do all the work. I have never even complained that he played all day. So my question is this, should I explain to my mom that I don't appreciate that she said what she did in a public place (where his family will see, take offense, and be mad with me & her) or just let it go? I know if I say anything she will either make it out into a huge deal, or she will brush it off and get angry and say something along the lines of I attacked her and I'm the one lying...

So is it worth the arguement to make my feelings known? When it bothered me more than anything she's pulled in the. Past?
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by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 5:42 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MamaTabb
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 5:43 PM
He lays awake at night thinking about how much dd and I deserve but don't get because we just don't have the money.
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akgraff
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 5:49 PM

you need to confront her and tell her to mind her own business to say and if she doesn't have anything nice to say then don't say anything at all and if she keeps it up then maybe you two shouldn't be on speaking terms for a while. She needs to get over whatever it is between you all. If you say anything or complain even about one thing to her about your husband  your just feeding her more amo, so if you do that, cut it out bc you don't need her drama. GL. You should also show and tell your husband how much he's a good father and how much you love him and what it is he does that makes him so great bc your mom's words might start dragging him down

LovelyMother88
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 6:10 PM

If it were me...I would let my feelings be known. I would be SO upset if my mother did that. That was very childish and uncalled for. I would not allow my husband to be belittled and insulted, no matter who said it.


wilesmomma
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 6:12 PM
If my mother disrespected my dh like that, she would not be in my life. You need to confront her.
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EireLass
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 6:40 PM

If it were me, I would write her a letter, explaining that I'm a grown woman, who has chosen a life mate, and am very happy in my family, etc etc. You don't have to go into any 'you this' or you that'. No need to throw rocks at her, just tell her where you stand in your life. She'll no doubt, contact you to talk. And you can always hang up the phone if she starts on you. I would also delete her from your FB account. No need for stress. 

jenbscott
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 6:58 PM

Has he ever given her a reason not to like him? If no, then I don't think it's worth your time explaining because she probably just wants to start drama and she'll pick at any little thing to spark your anger.

As long as you and your hubby are on one accord, it doesn't really matter what others think or say. People will always talk crap, even loved ones...even when there's no crap to talk about.

If you want her to know your feelings, try expressing it in the most respectable way you can. If she listens, she listens, if she doesn't, who cares?

Just make it known, in front of family, with your actions that you love him. I don't think you should confront her in front of everyone out of nowhere. If she says something negative when others are around just say "no he doesn't" or "i don't think so" and walk away. If she picks a fight, everyone will see that SHE'S the one with a problem.

Hope things getter better for you =)

A.Perry
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 7:02 PM

From what I read, it is not worth the argument.

tiger_tatted1
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 7:06 PM

If you think she will say you attacked her on the matter then do it publicly like she did. Comment on her FB how you dont appreciate her remarks and go on to explain how wonderful of a husband and father your man is and you hope oneday she will stop being so judgemental and see him for him and leave it at that. Dont go back and forth...

Good Luck!

dmdblleb
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 7:09 PM

I'd delete the post then contact her privately and let her know where you stand. I will not allow anyone to disrespect my dh. My dad made a negative comment about my dh and I went off. No one knows your dh as well as you do. As long as you and he are happy, screw what anyone else thinks. If she can't behave, she doesn't need to be in your lives.

new_mommy_11_10
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 7:27 PM
I think it worn the argument to stand up for your husband and your feelings
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