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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage
I posted on my FB status today that I would be playing the wii in hopes of beating some of my hubbys top scores. Already in the last week my mother has had an arguement with Hubby, and he just backed away from it. Well she commented that "he's and addict! He constatntly plays and doesn't parent". In reality, he doesn't play all the time and more than 99% of the time we are playing together. He just beats me and has higher scores. He is an amazing Father to our beautiful 4 month old(as of today :D). And he has changed in a lot of ways that most people haven't seen because we live over 1000 miles from home.
Hubby saw the comment she left and simply responded that he didn't play all the time. I texted him and he said that it was okay and it didn't bother him...but its not okay and it did bother me.

My mother has been after us getting a divorce since before we even got married. She didn't even go to our wedding. Instead she went on a physco breakdown and left me at fault for it. I have never said anything about Hubby being a bad parent, I have never said that I do all the work. I have never even complained that he played all day. So my question is this, should I explain to my mom that I don't appreciate that she said what she did in a public place (where his family will see, take offense, and be mad with me & her) or just let it go? I know if I say anything she will either make it out into a huge deal, or she will brush it off and get angry and say something along the lines of I attacked her and I'm the one lying...

So is it worth the arguement to make my feelings known? When it bothered me more than anything she's pulled in the. Past?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 5:42 PM
Replies (11-14):
DaniandTom
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 7:39 PM

 Personally, I think it sounds like your mother has some problems that are the root cause of all this nonsense. It sounds like no matter what you do, you're just not going to win with her in which case the rest of your family probably knows how she is so they will understand that it isn't your husband but her who is the problem. Don't worry about what other people think--do what feels right to you. You're the only one who has any clue how she would react to a confrontation or how it would make you feel. If you think it will make a difference in how she acts or make you feel better...go for it. Tell her what you think and to back off. However, if you don't think it will change her behavior or if you're going to feel worse by telling her off, then why bother? You'll just be shovelling sand against the tide.

kjbugsmom1517
by Bronze Member on Dec. 27, 2010 at 7:43 PM
Def stand up for ur husband.. And delete the comment.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MamaTabb
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 9:16 PM
Thanks Ladies.
To answer a questionm asked, we dated off and on in high school. I cried over him countless nights when we would break up, but I knew he was my soulmate. It hurt so much more than any other breakups.
Then about 6 months after we got married I caught him in what he admitted to be a visual and verbal affair.
But we have talked things through and we work on the issues as they arrise.
I just found the comment out of line, and its been one thing after another with her, here lately.

Thank you all. I posted a comment under hers and have not heard from her all day.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Godblessedmex4
by on Dec. 27, 2010 at 9:48 PM
You are describing something very similar to something I went through with DH aunt in November. DD birthday was Nov 28th and hardly anyone called her from DH side of the family. A friend of mine posted on Facebook happy late birthday Kendra, Auntie was sick yesterday hop it was a good one I miss you. I replayed back saying..."don't feel bad atleast you remembered, my bil, mil, and a set of Richards grandparents didn't even remember! I get a reply back a few hours later from DH aunt bitching me out assuming the grandparents I was speaking of were her parents. She said some seriously mean things to me, the niceties thing she said in her entire rant was what a white trash person I was. Well I sure as heck wasn't letting that go! She started it and I was gonna end it! IMO you need to say something, you can't let it eat at you, its going to continue to bother you and and that's not fair. Don't sink down to her level but make it clear that was not acceptable.
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