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Tired of it. (posted in another group too)

Posted by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 2:37 AM
  • 11 Replies

 Do you do whatever your husband wants, whenever he wants sexually? it seems the only way to please my husband is to do that, and I'm just not like that. He's just never happy. All our focus ends up on what HE wants and not what I want because he's never happy. Not too long ago we didn't do it often enough, so I tried to increase how much we do it. Now I'm not "spontaneous" enough. He always has something to complain about. ALWAYS. Whats worse is he says these things when he wants it and I don't want to give it to him. Like he's trying to guilt trip me. Like tonight he wanted to have sex but he wanted me to do certain things I just wasn't in the mood for. I wasn't saying we can't have sex at all, just not those things tonight. He started on "How come you're never spontaneous? How come you never want to just please me?" If only  he knew how much of a turn off this is to me (and yes, I've told him, it just doesn't get through.) If I try to talk to him about this stuff it turns into an argument. He tries to tell me that's not what he's saying and doing... Uhm?

Ugh and probably none of that makes sense but it's so hard to explain what I mean but this is getting rediculous, I'm so tired of it.

Okay vent over lol.

by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 2:37 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Ohio.SAHMof2
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 5:30 AM
Oh sweetie I'm sorry that you are going through this. I can't imagine how you feel right now. I can't. It seems like your DH is being selfish!
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x3.babymama.x3
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 5:33 AM
i agree with the selfish part. Im sorry your having to go through this.
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Summerlion1123
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 12:24 PM

 Thanks, it is frustrating.

ShannaBee
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 12:31 PM
Does he know how uncomfortable certain things make you feel? Try to make him understand because he is being selfish and needs to clear his line of thought. Good luck.
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kirbymom
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 12:42 PM

 I'm sorry to hear your having problems. Do you think maybe you should try using extra curricular items once in awhile? That might get him into a different frame of mind and help you feel more in the mood.  My husband does this for me once in awhile. You might have low estrogen. I do.  Low estrogen sometimes interfers with you wanting to have playtime. It also affects your moods. Try using some over the counter stimulant like ky jelly. It helps me. Maybe watch some videos??  Do'nt give up yet. It took me 6/7 yrs to get through this. Of course not everybody is as thick headed as I was.  lol You can do this! I have faith in you. :)

mommy2angel
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 7:32 PM

 AGREED!!!

Quoting Ohio.SAHMof2:

Oh sweetie I'm sorry that you are going through this. I can't imagine how you feel right now. I can't. It seems like your DH is being selfish!

 


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CreedMama3
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 7:38 PM

wow, why all of sudden he wants to do specific things? sounds kinda odd to me. my husband and i hit that point in our marriage and i told him that if it turned me off i would not do it. my husband now listens to me. ive been married 5 years and so far it works both ways in the bedroom. lol. I'm sorry for how things are going for you. have you tried talking to him about it? maybe try counseling?

Manda-Nicole92
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 7:41 PM

I like being made to do what ever it is my husband wants. When we got married we both knew what the other liked and what 'limits' there were. Plus I kind of get off on a control freak in the bedroom ;)

For women who don't have that kink I'd say it is wrong and he should consider what you like as well. He sounds kindo f selfish.

diosa694
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 7:45 PM
Stand up for urself....ur not a hore ur a wife....he needs to respect u...also u need to check on him make sure he's not straying away
AKluth
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 7:48 PM

I know its frustrating. Question though.. does he EVER just "please" you? Cause it seem really selfish to me for him to expect that.. and how is it spontaneous if he;s telling you what to do? He should just be happy he's getting some my goodness!! I mean im not saying you shouldnt be spontaneous or do diff things... but it just sounds to me like he's being super selfish!!!

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