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Family funerals

Posted by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 10:28 AM
  • 6 Replies

I hate to be a downer but I have something that is on my mind. My hsbands grandmother passed away at the end of last week and the funeral was yesterday. My husband is the youngest of 3 boys. All boys are married and we all live in Texas. I was the only wife that was there and we were the only ones that came early as requested by my mother and father in law . It just un-nerves me that the other wives did not bother to show up , and neither of them have jobs that would keep them away. I also can not belive that neither of the other boys bothered to come even an hour early to be there for their parents. Uggggg I may be being petty but this is a trend and is really starting to bother me. It just makes me sad that they are not more active in their parents lives and it bothers their parents too. Am I the only one with sister or brother in laws that do this ?


by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 10:28 AM
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Replies (1-6):
ShannaBee
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 10:35 AM
I may sound harsh but I will not show up to any of DH's family functions anymore. They have always disrespected me and so I have removed myself from the family.
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RutterMama
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 11:28 AM
Wow... It would bother me too.
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sew4fun
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 12:34 PM

Shanna I do understand if there is disrespect beign shown but there is not in this case. My inlaws are very loving and kind, they mind their own business when it comes to their kids lives and such so I am just not understanding what the deal is !

ShannaBee
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 12:49 PM


Quoting sew4fun:

Shanna I do understand if there is disrespect beign shown but there is not in this case. My inlaws are very loving and kind, they mind their own business when it comes to their kids lives and such so I am just not understanding what the deal is !

Maybe they feel since it's not their immediate family and just inlaws that it's not important to them? I don't know, that is quite disrespectful since there is no bad blood between the family. I wonder how the husbands feel that there wives aren't there holding them up and being supportive by just being there. If my DH wanted me at an inlaw funcion I THINK that I may be able to suck it up for him and go because I love him that much.

okhsmom
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 1:27 PM

People deal with death each in his/her own way.  I'm not sure that judgement is fair in this situation.  When I've gone to a funeral, its been because I wanted to be there, not for any other reason, not because I owed it to anyone, not because it was the right thing to do in general, but because attending the funeral was important to me in honoring the relationship I had with the deceased, not the relationships I have/had with the living.

AnGLInterrupted
by Kendall on Mar. 2, 2011 at 2:00 PM

In the case of my MIL, I doubt my husband would go the funeral.  He and his mother are toxic together.  She is a manipulative, evil person.  It's a long long story, trust me.  But in your situation, I would have been there, to support my spouse.  For him to be able to lean on me if needed, even if I was uncomfortable.b  And when FIL goes, then I'm going to be there.  I don't know him very well, but he's a great man, and he was a great father to DH.

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