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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Better Communication Day 19: Time for Some Housework!

Posted by on May. 19, 2011 at 3:13 PM
  • 48 Replies

Among all the things couples fight about, housework is one of the most common. In fact, one marriage expert calls it the #3 fight, after money and children. Are the "chore wars" common in your household?

Your activity for May 20 is: Talk About Housework. Today, have an honest conversation about housework in your home: how much you do, what you think you should be doing, what drives you crazy, what you wish he did more of, etc. If you need some questions to get the conversation started, you can try asking each other some of these:

  • What chores do I do that you most appreciate?
  • What is your least favorite chore?
  • How can you help me with certain tasks more often?
  • How can we work together to decrease our overall household chore burden?

We also recommend this suggestion from Dr. Howard Markman, author of "Fighting for Your Marriage": Choose one specific time each week to argue about housework, and ONLY talk about it then. That way, it doesn't become a constant fight. You can read more of Dr. Markman's advice in this article.

How can you change the chore wars in your house? Tell us in the replies below!

Plus, if you missed yesterday's Remember When game, you can find it here.

by on May. 19, 2011 at 3:13 PM
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Replies (1-10):
ShannaBee
by Platinum Member on May. 19, 2011 at 10:48 PM
Uh. We squabble over this all the time.
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collegemama2one
by on May. 19, 2011 at 11:01 PM

We have talked about this and decided that we will take turns doing different chores. It works great.

BonitaM
by Platinum Member on May. 19, 2011 at 11:06 PM

Him: dishes  Me: you going to work

Him: going to work  Me: dishes

lol  Funny how those just got reversed haha.

I won't ask him this question cause he shouldn't have to help me and I can't do his job for him.
We both agree that we need more cupboards/storage space to eliminate the clutter.

We really don't have any chore wars because we both agree they are my responsibility.  I'm always greatful if he helps out though. ;o)

Desiree9
by on May. 19, 2011 at 11:07 PM

photo

We don't have this issue
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Tifferoo3
by on May. 19, 2011 at 11:10 PM
We don't have this issue either
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hfaddis
by on May. 19, 2011 at 11:13 PM

We honestly don't fight over chores at all, he expects me to only do as much as i can with the kiddos wanting somethin all the time especially since my 2 month old is always stuck to me... he says he is my other half and where i cna't keep up its his job to pick up the slack! i try to help him as much as i can and he in turn does the same with me

txmomof3
by on May. 19, 2011 at 11:16 PM

Hubby works 2 jobs, so I usually do all of the chores around the house, except for some yard work. I do wish I could get him to do the dishes every once in a while, though, cause I hate doing the dishes.

sew4fun
by on May. 19, 2011 at 11:19 PM

We do not have an issue with chores. I do most of them , and he helps out when I need him to. He knows when I need help and he helps. If I do have to ask he knows I really really need it and does not at all hesitate he gets up and does it .

momof2angels491
by on May. 19, 2011 at 11:26 PM

There aren't any chore wars in our home. It's strictly inside is mine, outside is his...

brieri
by on May. 19, 2011 at 11:31 PM

 

  • What chores do I do that you most appreciate?  He will do the outside work and I do the inside housework.
  • What is your least favorite chore? cleaning the toilets and bathtub
  • How can you help me with certain tasks more often? if he would listen to me more he would understand exactly what I want him to do.
  • How can we work together to decrease our overall household chore burden? He needs to listen to me and stop talking so much.  But he does love the outside work where he can dirty - so I don't mind it too much
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