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I don't know what I'm doing wrong...:(

Posted by on May. 21, 2011 at 12:39 PM
  • 9 Replies

The past couple days I try to do everything I can to make my husband happy. I love him like crazy and I want to know I can make him happy. Every time I try though he makes a cocky comment or gives me a dirty look. It seems like I can do the littlest thing on accident and he snaps. He never wants sex, and if I ask for it I usually get a no, and he tells me we are married we should only have sex once in a while. I feel like no matter what I cant make him happy. I cook all his meals, clean the house, do the laundry, take car of dd, make sure I look good, give him his space to do what he wants, and I will do anything to please him. Yet he doesn't want me. I feel like I'm failing and I don't know what to do. So much of me just wants to leave because that seems like what he wants, but with my religion I have to stick it out. It's so hard though and I'm lost...any advice?

by on May. 21, 2011 at 12:39 PM
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Replies (1-9):
kjoarcik
by on May. 21, 2011 at 12:40 PM

You probably already have....but did you try talking to him? Tell him it's time for a serious conversation because you want to know where this marriage is going.

chamelinmom
by on May. 21, 2011 at 12:42 PM

One advice i was given that is really smart was ask him everyday "WHAT CAN I DO TO MAKE YOUR DAY A LITTLE EASIER" A lot of times you may be doing things he doesnt care about but leave one thing that you dont care about and that really may bug him. . have you tried to talk to him and ask him whats wrong or ask if there is anything else you can do to make him happy?

Bird16_J
by on May. 21, 2011 at 12:50 PM

I'm sorry but it sounds like he's checked outta the marriage and doesn't care anymore. Religion or not I would be gone like the wind. There is NO point in keeping yourself miserable in that situation and having your children seeing that and thinking thats how a relationship is supposed to look. Good luck because no matter what your religion you should do the best thing for yourself AND your children!

Grumpylilpixy
by on May. 21, 2011 at 1:58 PM

*lol* I had this happen, I changed it up. Got a job, started school and cared basically  abouot me and my kiddo's and basically without telling him to screw himself. He seen the change and he started changing he knew he was going to lose me if he didn't straighen up. Basically stop making him your complete world find something to do for yourself. Stop worrying about him. If he throws a fit ignore it walk away don't try to fix it. If he is used to you reacting one way. Switch it up. Change it act the opposite. Men always think something is up when you are no longer the book that they can read. 

Grumpylilpixy
by on May. 21, 2011 at 1:59 PM

True . I believe in marriage but I would rather be alone then be miserable.

Quoting Bird16_J:

I'm sorry but it sounds like he's checked outta the marriage and doesn't care anymore. Religion or not I would be gone like the wind. There is NO point in keeping yourself miserable in that situation and having your children seeing that and thinking thats how a relationship is supposed to look. Good luck because no matter what your religion you should do the best thing for yourself AND your children!


hc_ac_jc_nc
by on May. 21, 2011 at 5:19 PM
I think Imma follow in your footsteps bc Im going through almost the exact same thing... I have a job interview Monday so Im hopin things will lighten up around here...


Quoting Grumpylilpixy:

*lol* I had this happen, I changed it up. Got a job, started school and cared basically  abouot me and my kiddo's and basically without telling him to screw himself. He seen the change and he started changing he knew he was going to lose me if he didn't straighen up. Basically stop making him your complete world find something to do for yourself. Stop worrying about him. If he throws a fit ignore it walk away don't try to fix it. If he is used to you reacting one way. Switch it up. Change it act the opposite. Men always think something is up when you are no longer the book that they can read. 


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mommas3cubs
by on May. 21, 2011 at 5:22 PM

He knows you better than we do, Maybe he thinks you are doing it( All those nice things)  to get something out of it. You need to talk to him, and do not be aggressive about it otherwise he will shut you out and get defensive.Good luck.


kirstn007
by on May. 21, 2011 at 5:24 PM
well from what u are tellling me it doesnt sound like u are doing anything wrong, could he be cheating or not wanting the marriage anymore? it just really points to cheating to me. i hope u figure it out. u sound like a great woman and u deserve to be with someone who appreaciates what u do, i hope he wakes up
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armywife2408
by on May. 21, 2011 at 5:38 PM

Thank-you everyone for your advice. I have tried talking to him. He says nothing is wrong, and literally rolls his eyes. Maybe I'll try and focus on me. I'm so close to finishing my degree, but I didn't sign up for classes this semester. It just hurts, it's hard to make it about me when I love him so much....but I'm starting to feel like I better finish my college, and come up with a back up plan...just because I wont leave...doesn't mean he will stay. Cheating has crossed my mind...because he wont even sleep with me anymore, unless I beg. Which I don't get because I'm not ugly, and the guys from the past always loved being with me. Okay I'm rambling, but thank you again ladies for the advice.

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