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How to Make Your Marriage a Priority

Posted by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 8:31 AM
  • 11 Replies

Statistics have indicated that the divorce rate is about 50%. Even so, the dream of sharing your life with the one you love hasn't discouraged even the most pessimistic of us. If you are lucky enough to have already found that person, learn to do the regular maintenance to keep it strong.

It is sometimes hard to prioritize our marriage balancing career, children and/or other family obligations. Studies have shown that a vital marriage improves life satisfaction as well as general health. While the suggestions seem pretty simple, sometimes it is easier said than done.

Difficulty:
Moderately Easy

Instructions

    • 1

      Settle for less than roses and long walks on the beach.

      Romance can be idealized by the media, however, the most important thing isn't the flower petals and champagne. It is the value of making the time to be together. Notice I didn't say "find" the time but "create" the time. The physical time together is critical. Whether you have 30 minutes or 30 hours to dedicate to each other, settle for less than perfection. Carve out a set amount of quiet time to be together to catch up, hold hands, and re-connect. It doesn't matter what the setting and accessories are as long you are making the effort to regularly be together.

    • 2

      Don't short change your time.

      We make time for our kids, our parents, our employers. Make time for yourself. Partner time is just as vital as an meeting or a project at work. Make a routine of re-connecting through out the day. Drop an email, leave a message, send a photograph. If you have picked a time to be together, don't reschedule it. The time is just as important as any other commitment, if not more so.

    • 3

      Treat your partner as a friend. Be a good friend.

      Sounds obvious but can be hard. We have a way of taking our loved one for granted. After sharing the intimacies of marriage sometimes we can lose sight of our partner as an independent person.

      1. Respect them as an individual- encourage their opinions, interests, hobbies, friendships

      2. Be patient with them- yes, they will get repetitive. Yes, they will make seemingly more mistakes than most (since you are there to witness them first hand). Give them the same consideration and patience you would a stranger. They deserve it.

      3. Exercise some manners. It is all too easy to drop the "Thank you", "Sorry, I hurt your feelings", "I appreciate your help".

      4. Make them feel special. Little things mean a lot. Still do the little things.

      5. Share yourself. As your would a friend, share your feelings, frustrations and hopes. Don't lose touch with each other in areas of importance, this is how people grow apart.

      6. Celebrate your life together. Laugh together.
      While we cherish our "other" friendships for the shared memories, we tend to over look this with our spouse. We'll laugh and live our glory years with our "friends" but forget to do this with our partner. Take time to live and laugh and remember your life together.
      Yes, you have to discuss the here-and-now, the kids needs, the "to do list", what is going on the calendar, etc. but take the time moments to celebrate the years past and the years done right.

      7. Listen to what your spouse says.
      Don't cut them off, diminish their suggestions or opinions, or be distracted. Try to listen with an open mind and with interest.

    • 4

      Maintain a physical relationship-- in big ways and small.

      Take time to have a sexual relationship. Make your spouse feel attractive- tell them when they look good. Keep the flirt alive. Take time to still wear make-up, cologne... some of the extras you would have done in your dating years. While this doesn't have to be all the time, the "sometimes" can go a long way. Remind yourself of all the reasons physically you got together. Even if you are not a PDA (public display of affection person), holding hands, rubbing a knee or a long hug matters-- and matters a lot.

    • 5

      Run away together.

      Regardless of your budget, every now and then go away together. Leave your current hometown. There is a liberating sense of adventure and discovery in going somewhere new. Whether it is a day trip to a neighboring town or a big trip to Hawaii, find some time to develop new memories, new dreams.

      Oh yeah, leave the kids at home. A marriage needs some extended alone time. It will teach your kids that your relationship with each other is just as important as your relationship with them. How you act with each other demonstrates how a relationship works. They may not like it in the beginning but they will get used to it.


Read more: How to Make Your Marriage a Priority | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/how_5314432_make-marriage-priority.html#ixzz1OJGtqQ5f




by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 8:31 AM
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Replies (1-10):
i.heart.myboys
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 8:53 AM
Love this!! Yes. I know sometimes I don't do some of these good enough but I am going to try harder that's for sure.
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biancalina20
by Bianca Lina on Jun. 4, 2011 at 11:20 AM
Thx for sharing! I like it a lot!! :)
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mommas3cubs
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 11:30 AM


Quoting i.heart.myboys:

Love this!! Yes. I know sometimes I don't do some of these good enough but I am going to try harder that's for sure.

Good for you! We put God first then our Marriage then the kids then everyone else then ourselves!




newbie623
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 12:39 PM

I have done most of those my entire relationship/marriage with my DH. I am able to tell you we are seperated because he isn't happy anymore. If I was a nagging bitch, maybe he would have been happy....lol.  Hope it works for you ladies.

Hottmomma607
by Trica on Jun. 4, 2011 at 1:11 PM
*like* My thing is when there are too many excuses to spend time or make time,I see it as an problem. Drop those excuses make the time with your spouses! Its worth it in the end!!
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mommas3cubs
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 8:32 PM

BUMPY



la_bella_vita
by Bella on Jun. 4, 2011 at 11:46 PM
Bump : )
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sweetmissy_05
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 11:48 PM

Thanks for sharing!! Love it!!

ShannaBee
by on Jun. 5, 2011 at 3:31 AM

thanks for sharing

Kimbkay
by on Jun. 5, 2011 at 3:41 AM
Bump
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