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off topic but need advice

Posted by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 8:48 PM
  • 13 Replies
I know some of you married your high school sweetheart or had sex at a young age...
Well I have a 15 year old girl that has a bf they have been together 2 years now and going into high school this year... well there way close and very affectionate in public... when I have talk to my daughter she's like mom I'm not having sex yet the bfs mom thinks they r her bf told his mom that my daughter dosent want to so which means they have talked about it... now I'm naive thinking if she's like me she's not yet I believe once she is in high school still dating him its bound to happen... I wanna approach it again to say hey if u r gunna let's make sure your protected yet I don't want her to give her an ok I know she's just gunna get defensive with me... any suggestions?
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by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 8:48 PM
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by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 9:01 PM

 No, I would like to know though, for when my daughter is a teen.

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by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 9:01 PM


by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 9:02 PM
Just sit her down and talk to her about birth control. Give her condoms and take her to get bc as a just in case kinda thing. She is going to get defensive.
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by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 9:05 PM

I think you definitely need to talk to her but dont do it with too much pressure.  Explain to her how hard it is to have a baby at her age and what if that baby gets colics and is always fussy and doesnt sleep, she will have to quit school, her bf will turn away from her, and she will loose all of her friends and will have to quit school to take care of baby and see if that is the life that she chooses.  Of course each situation is different but you need to educate her as a concerned parent and at the same time be her friend so she doesnt close up and turn away from you thinking you will ground her for it.  Convince her to tell you when she is ready so you can talk about birth control for her because you cant count on a young boy to use protection and an abortion is not even an option to think about because she will commit murder and have to live with it for life.  But most important explain how it is important to make smart decisions like not having sex until she gets married.  Its a tough situation but i think with proper education on topic she will make smart decision when the time comes, if she wants to start having sex she will do it even without you knowing about it but she needs to know the consequences of her actions.  Good luck with it i hope this helps.

by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 9:17 PM

 jus take an easy apporch(spelling) to it. dont force her to listen you wont get anywhere..

by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 9:20 PM
Perhaps at her next doctors appointment you could ask her doctor to tslkk to her about it?
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by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 9:49 PM

Just tell her you'd be happy to provide her with any means of birth control that she'd like, and you'd be happy to take her to a GYN. Explain it's safer to get these things from Mom and her Dr. than from friends, school nurse, etc. And tell the boy the same thing. Talk to them about disease, that condoms are still best, because of that, etc. BUT....whatever you tell her, you need to be true to your word. If she comes to you in a week and tells you she's ready for sex, what will you do? 

by Member on Aug. 17, 2011 at 9:49 PM
Ok I am just gonna tell you what my mom did with me at 15 and I did the same thing with my step daughter. My mom made me call my boyfriend over and she sat us both down and had a talk that went something like this......
I think you are both too young to be doing anything and in all honesty I wish you wouldn't. However, I am not stupid or naive and I know I can't be with you at all times. I also know what it's like when you think you are in love and hormones are raging so because of that.... you young lady are going on the pill and you Mr. man better wrap it up. This is NOT giving you permission nor am I in any way condoning sex. But like I said I am not naive and I don't want to be a grandmother and I sure as heck don't want her to end up with any STDS. UNDERSTOOD? umm of course we both nodded......LOL

My mom and I always kept the line of communicaton open ALWAYS. Even if I knew my mom didn't agree with something or like something I knew I could come to her with anything. Still can even though I'm 33 now.
Let me make it clear my mom is a firm believer of being a virgin when you get married and had always instilled that into us. But like she said we will make our own decisions so. ....just be honest with your daughter. You both might feel weird at first but she will be glad to know she can talk to you.
by on Aug. 18, 2011 at 4:55 AM

My mom told me to be safe, how birthcontrol worked, and that it was my decision, I would know when I was ready.

 When I was in highschool, I saw what sex did to everyone, fights it caused, heartbreak, and dumb behavior, I honestly felt that sex complacited everything, it changes everything, so I waited untill after I was 18, but that was my choice.  


by on Aug. 18, 2011 at 5:14 AM

just have a conversation with her in a soft way and explain to her that our bodies are holy temples of God and we need to take good care of them  and that the bf should never take any advantage over her. let them be patient till their time comes

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