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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage
Why is it that there is always at least one female friend who urges me to leave my husband when I complain about his wrong doings? I know my husband isn't perfect. He makes mistakes and sometimes pisses me the duck off. But I VOWED to love him in the worst of times. Sometimes I have to nag him, push him, remind him, challenge him. Sometimes I get tired if doing these things and I vent a little to my friends. Someone always comes back with "you deserve better. You should get out now while you still can." Whats that supposed to mean anyways? While I still can? I'm married to him. Lol. Theres no turning back now. And people are worried about gays ruining the sanctity of the holy union. Its like they think you should break up a family if the other person makes you feel anything but happy go lucky all the time. I'm sure any of you know as well as me that marriage is WORK! That there are times you want to leave, times you get so mad you could hurt something... But marriage is working thru those times TOGETHER! I don't know how to end this vent so....


EDIT:
Its not all if my friends, its a couple of them inparticular. And I can gaurantee that is not all bad stuff they hear about the hubbz. I praise him often. And these friends are in seemingly healthy relationships themselves.
About taking my problems to a professional, these "problems" are not serious enough to pay a professional for. Lol. Besides, if I can't complain/vent to my friends about everything then what good are they?
I expect my friends to be honest with me. I don't look for advise, I just want to vent. But when friends come to me about silly things their SO does that just irks them, I don't immediately start in on the bashing! Usually what I say is "yeah, I hate it when dh does that too." Or tell them that, yes, I understand why shes upset about it, but it isn't a serious matter.

by on Jan. 7, 2012 at 7:10 PM
Replies (11-20):
theresaphilly
by Bronze Member on Jan. 7, 2012 at 9:08 PM
3 moms liked this

Stop taking problems outside your marriage, if so say positive things about your husband or say nothing at all. She probably thinks your entire marriage SUCKS! I never discuss my problems with anyone who is not a professional or who has not been in my shoes.

CoffeeMamaOf5
by on Jan. 7, 2012 at 9:10 PM

well said

mamabearofgirls
by on Jan. 7, 2012 at 9:51 PM
3 moms liked this

I'm sorry and I hope not to make you mad.  But your not being fair to your friends.  You can't call and B about your husband and expect them to just know what you want them to say.  Do you want them to bash him with you or tell you how great he is while you are pissed at him.  If you want your friends to like him then dont call them and expect them to just forget all the things you say upsets you.  They are your friends and want you to be ok and happy.  Treat them right and dont put them in the middle.

Earth_Mama90
by on Jan. 7, 2012 at 9:53 PM
Unless he is beating or cheating I think its inapporiate for them to say that
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MomToovey
by Marianne on Jan. 7, 2012 at 10:43 PM

 Couldn't have said it better myself, amen sister!

clapping

mommas3cubs
by on Jan. 7, 2012 at 10:44 PM


Quoting theresaphilly:

Stop taking problems outside your marriage, if so say positive things about your husband or say nothing at all. She probably thinks your entire marriage SUCKS! I never discuss my problems with anyone who is not a professional or who has not been in my shoes.

this. 

ryahzMommy
by on Jan. 7, 2012 at 11:51 PM
Lol
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tyanneS
by on Jan. 8, 2012 at 1:42 AM
I think you have the wrong friends.
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jesslock
by on Jan. 8, 2012 at 1:50 AM
This.


Quoting mamabearofgirls:

I'm sorry and I hope not to make you mad.  But your not being fair to your friends.  You can't call and B about your husband and expect them to just know what you want them to say.  Do you want them to bash him with you or tell you how great he is while you are pissed at him.  If you want your friends to like him then dont call them and expect them to just forget all the things you say upsets you.  They are your friends and want you to be ok and happy.  Treat them right and dont put them in the middle.


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phrenicfire89
by on Jan. 8, 2012 at 1:57 AM
I agree 100%, its so frustrating. I am also in the same situation.
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