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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

YOUR THOUGHTS ?! UNAPPERCIATIVE OR NOT ?

Posted by on Feb. 11, 2012 at 4:24 PM
  • 20 Replies

For my birthday,  hubby decided to take me out to a movie, lunch and got a sitter lined up.    I told him I was nervous about the sitter since I had only met her once before.  And that I didn't want to go to a movie. I wanted to do something else.   I don't like going to the movies .... they cost too much and it's just too loud for me. 

My thought was that it was my B-day, we should do what I wanted. When it's his B-day, we can do what he wants.

But some one told me I was a horrible wife and that he would end up leaving me if I kept acting this way.

We ended up using his sitter and went to lunch and a local museum. 

Does this make me an unappreciative wife or not ? 

by on Feb. 11, 2012 at 4:24 PM
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Replies (1-10):
pinkysmommy720
by Member on Feb. 11, 2012 at 4:28 PM
2 moms liked this

I wouldnt say it makes you unappreciative, but I think it is sweet he arranged everything so you didnt have to worry about it.

Mrs.Foley
by on Feb. 11, 2012 at 4:30 PM
Omg, whatever! It's 2012 and we have the right to speak up about our own bdays! I'm not a fan of theaters either. We did what my dh wanted for my bday and I was upset, but he wanted to just sit at home and do nothing, that was a waste of a sitter!
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batsbelfry
by Platinum Member on Feb. 11, 2012 at 4:38 PM

If you called him an idiot for thinking of going to a movie that he knows you don't like anyway then yes that is unappreciative but if you kindly explained that you don't like movies and would prefer to goto a museum then no.  It was your bday so why not do what you want as long as you handle with care KWIM 

monique76
by Member on Feb. 11, 2012 at 5:37 PM
No way-it's your birthday your choice,
.Diddles.
by on Feb. 11, 2012 at 5:46 PM

As long as you explained it to him nicely and he was ok with the switch then I don't see why it matters. It was your birthday so you should be happy with the plans on your birthday. 

jellymom599
by on Feb. 11, 2012 at 5:49 PM
No its doesn't its your birthday your day so if u wanna do something other then what he wants then he should be fine with that also, he really said if you keep acting like that he going to leave you wow that's a slap in the face you should of done something without him if he wanted to act like that that's not right.
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littlepinkrose
by Member on Feb. 11, 2012 at 5:51 PM

No it does not. Maybe you should both decide to ask the other what they would like to do for there birthday or just sit down before the big day and say what you expect or what you would like to do.  That way someone can plan a special day but they do what you want.  If it is your birthday someone should plan the day around what you like to do in my opinion.  Unless you told him to surprise you then you get what you asked for LoL!!  If he were to leave you for that he has issues.

spicy_n_sweet
by on Feb. 11, 2012 at 5:55 PM

I wouldn't say unappreciative.  Based on this post alone. I would say it's more likely a case of not really understanding your husband's way of showing love and appreciation towards you. Everyone shows and interprets love, apprectiation, respect (and so on) differently. Lots of issues pop up in relationships simply because of not really understanding how each other shows and interprets those things. It's really important for life partners to really understand and accept how one another shows/interprets love, appreciation, admiration, respect and so on.  I think understanding and accepting the thoughts and feelings behind a partner's action is far more important than the action all alone.  If you really understand and accept what a partner is trying to demonstrate and express through an action, it makes the action far more meaningful.

MomToovey
by Marianne on Feb. 11, 2012 at 6:10 PM

 I don't think it's wrong to want to do what YOU want to do on YOUR birthday at all. I do think it's sweet that your DH went to all that trouble to try to think of a nice time out for you. As long as you let him know you appreciate the gesture and kindly tell him you'd like to do something else, I don't think that's inappreciative at all. And even if it wasn't handled in a respectable manner, I highly doubt he'd leave you for wanting to do something else on your birthday! :)

danarae1976
by on Feb. 11, 2012 at 6:24 PM

No....hubby never said he would leave me .... LOL     Another female did. .... an unmarried female.  


Quoting jellymom599:

No its doesn't its your birthday your day so if u wanna do something other then what he wants then he should be fine with that also, he really said if you keep acting like that he going to leave you wow that's a slap in the face you should of done something without him if he wanted to act like that that's not right.


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