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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Need another womans opinion

Posted by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 5:30 PM
  • 36 Replies

Heres a little background on me and my significant other. We met a little over 2 years ago, had what i considered a bit of a rocky start but he doesnt agree. We really started getting close about 6 months into the relationship meeting families and so forth he had asked several times by then if I thought we should get married. we were exclusive(as far as I know). I found out i was pregnant a little over a year ago. We had our TWINS at the end of last year. He proposed a few months ago, we both knew it was coming though and I finally moved in a few weeks after. ( we both had houses so that was the moving in issue)

I've of course felt the lack of interest in us romantically, so started to get a little snoopy. I  was cheated on in my last marriage and definitely dont want to be put thru that again. He always tends to have his phone on silent and turned upside down on the entry table, away from us. which has always bothered me, but whatever.  I had gotten up one morning with the babies his phone was on the couch he went to bed after me. I decided to check the time on his phone since it was there, i saw a new text message, curiosity got the best of me and it was from some naked chick, and another pic of her friend. it just read hey its nicki and this is my friend. I flipped out ran in to get him, he told me it was a wrong number. he called to tell them not to send any more messages, said it was some drunk woman. he erased the number, i told him to.

A week later I went thru his phone interent history, craigslist personals. but not just wfm even transexuals. he said it was a guy thing, he uses it as porn and then he said for entertainment. not a big deal. I caught the same thing on his computer during my pregnancy he told me he was looking for his friend, i told him NEVER again. I thought it was maybe a porn thing and considered i was the size of Jupiter thought I would give him a break.

I log onto his email, after he gave me the password because I wasnt convinced a few days ago. I found a couple things he is a member of,  find a bbw lover and find a shemale lover? WTF?? signed up 2 years ago, doesnt look like theres been activity though but maybe im not seeing it. Of course he says he has no idea what im talking about, but its his usual screen name birthdate and location, even his wording in the profile. i didnt look at the shemale one that ones blocked at my job thank god. I tend to think its just a porn thing, i mean he likes ass sex but what guy doesnt? I'm bothered with it being a porn thing but thats better than actual contact and i sort of understand my body has been destroyed from a twin pregnancy. But i am working hard every day to lose weight. and im only 20lbs from pre pregnancy weight but 3-4 sizes bigger than i was. :(

He honestly does show me a lot of attention, and I wouldnt feel like anything was going on other than the lack of intimacy .

Ladies I need your opinions! I dont want to be blind sinded by love, again.

by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 5:30 PM
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Replies (1-10):
BonitaM
by Platinum Member on Apr. 16, 2012 at 5:58 PM
2 moms liked this

Craigslist + pics of naked girls = more than just a porn problem.  I'm sorry, but I'd do some more investigating this does not sound good.  

ProudMommy51006
by Bronze Member on Apr. 16, 2012 at 6:04 PM
1 mom liked this
Oh no, this sounds bad. I'm sorry! I do not think that is a guy thing, and there are way to many things.
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Deldirra
by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 6:05 PM
1 mom liked this
My ex was like that. Big porn addiction. He wanted butt sex more than regular. I was never willing to comply. Well one day he got a strap-on for me to use on him. I was totally disgusted. When I broke it off with him he started harassing by phone. I changed my number he started trying to get my friends on FB and Twitter to give me messeges. When they ignored him he started calling my boss. He had to threaten the law on him to leave me alone.

I'm not suggesting this would happen to u but a porn addiction is still an addiction. He needs help. the Craigslist thing kinda creeps me out. Reminds me of stuff the Craigslist killer did. And don't jump to conclusions on that statement either.
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mylilsunshine12
by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 6:09 PM

it is only human to be curious of all the signs i am currently dealing with a "porn thing" which literally drives me crazy considering the fact i feel so ugly being prego... i am a very jealous person i will admit and this is only after being married once before and cheated on i think u should investigate more (sounds sad/bad) but its only true that u dont want to go thru the same hurt of being cheated on. i think guys dont realize being cheated on breaks us down and kills our confidense more then ever. good luck to u and hope its nothing to bad ( found out mine wasnt to bad i kinda over exaturated!)

Nicki23
by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 6:27 PM

Thats just it I dont know if Im just over doing it, because of my past or if im not doing enough. I honestly still sort of believed the wrong number, ive never ever come across this with him before but didnt really look for it either although I havent snooped as often but have looked on occasion. I hate thinking i gave up my house for this. I confided in my mother who said, she doesnt see why he would buy me this nice of a ring and move me in only to cheat on me. IDK?

Angela_Barlow
by Bronze Member on Apr. 16, 2012 at 6:35 PM


Quoting BonitaM:

Craigslist + pics of naked girls = more than just a porn problem.  I'm sorry, but I'd do some more investigating this does not sound good.  

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Christywf
by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 6:44 PM
1 mom liked this

Get out.  Get out now.  He's not the man you thought he was and you are refusing to see who he really is.



 

Jerzymom
by Member on Apr. 16, 2012 at 7:36 PM
1 mom liked this

 Sorry , but I have to agree with the other ladies. Too creepy for me. He has a problem.

sydjademom24
by Rachel J on Apr. 16, 2012 at 7:42 PM
1 mom liked this

Yeah, I'm sorry, but in 9 years of marriage my husband and I have watched our fair share of porn, together and seperatley, but he has never ever been into that stuff. He's watched a girl take it in the butt from a guy, and has asked a couple times in 9 years if we could do that....and I did a couple times to make him happy, but once I explained that it was really uncomfortable for me and I really didn't like he stopped asking. It's been probably 4 years since he's asked anything related to that. But honestly if he's watching that stuff, or into that stuff then there is a problem. I know you don't want to see it, when we are in love we don't want to see the faults or problems, we try to sweep it under the rug or make excuses for them. But I think you need to dig a little deeper and really find out whats going on.

UsArmyWife2001
by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 9:15 PM
1 mom liked this

 It sounds pretty bad to me. I think BBW is a dating website.

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