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vent..not gonna happen again!

Posted by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 7:20 PM
  • 21 Replies
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Ok, when I married my husband,i got pregnant immediately but because we are so broke,i applied as housekeepee in the hospital though im 6 mos preggo.after I gave birth I went back to work less than 6 weeks and then hell began, husband told he wont wake up at night to feed the baby,i work 5 to 6 days a week from 7am to 3:30, but my luck baby wakes up every 2 hours and never did he take turn,so I get no sleep, gotta work 8 hours and when I get home I still have to cook and wash.dishes plus take care of the baby. It was hell.he doesnt help at all,if he does,its with complain.we send rhe baby to daycare while we work,yeah,i work to pay daycare.then, I got prego again with our second,we decided I will stay at home cause what I make can barely cover the daycare fee.
now we are moving to ar, he wants me to go back to work and send two kids to daycare but second baby still wakes up at night to eat.plus im a cna now,its a much harder job ans more physical and then when we go home I will still be the maid.hell no! I told him straight,its not happening! Sorry but if he wont help at night feeding and house chores I wont go back full time to work.he wouldnt teach me how to drive, wont discuss my plan to go back to school for my nursing course, he didnt even help pay my cna course.hell no! This time I wont be a fff...nn pushover, if I go back to work, ill be working nightshift and he can take care of baby at night.he doesnt know how hard my life was with our firstborn and would argue the baby wakes him up too, yeah but im the one who gets up every f...nnn night. Hes just not happy cause our kids are closer to mama than daddy... F..nn control power tripping asshole!
Rant..rant... Ok... I feel better now.
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by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 7:20 PM
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Replies (1-10):
findingserenity
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 7:29 PM
Oh yeah..we argued in front of the babies, ds2 asked me, mama, daddy mad? I told him its ok, then asked me, mama mad? I said, its ok, dont wori oki. Ive to talk to him about this.
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xmkj2011
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 7:30 PM
2 moms liked this
I do not blame you one bit. I wouldn't do it either. If I was you, I would honestly tell him look its either you help out with OUR kids and step up and be a man. If you can't help take care of our children and help everyone be happy maybe we don't need to be together. This is ridiculous!!! nd something needs to be done and things need to change ASAP. That's what I would say to him if u were you. I mean really honey you deserve to be happy, it seems like you are doing everything to please everyone and you are getting nothing in return. I wish you the best of luck mama and hope that you get the happiness you deserve to have!!!!
findingserenity
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 7:37 PM
I told him ill go back working full time if he will take turn with night feeding, and he said no, so I said, ill work nightshift he said, no, I have to work dayshift.. Uh no, not happening. H.


Quoting xmkj2011:

I do not blame you one bit. I wouldn't do it either. If I was you, I would honestly tell him look its either you help out with OUR kids and step up and be a man. If you can't help take care of our children and help everyone be happy maybe we don't need to be together. This is ridiculous!!! nd something needs to be done and things need to change ASAP. That's what I would say to him if u were you. I mean really honey you deserve to be happy, it seems like you are doing everything to please everyone and you are getting nothing in return. I wish you the best of luck mama and hope that you get the happiness you deserve to have!!!!

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Ichthus
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 7:37 PM
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What's the point of you going back to work if all it's going to pay for is daycare?? If it's not making you any income beyond that then I wouldn't see the point in working outside the home if you don't find it fulfilling. Explain to him that even though you don't get a paycheck, you DO work every day, all day, 24/7. Sorry; I hope you work it out so you're happy.

Monsita
by Silver Member on Apr. 25, 2012 at 7:55 PM

I totally understand what you are going through....

It happened to me!  He was out of work, and though he was searching for one...he WANTED ME TO PLACE THE BABIES IN DAYCARE....while I worked!

I said NO!  "If you are at home...you can take care of the kids..." "I was not going to pay day care while he was SEARCHING FOR A JOB..."

He WAS ACTING LIKE YOUR HUSBAND...It was hard on both of us, because I needed to him to take over WHILE I WAS AT WORK and he needed to know what does it means to BE MY HELPER with our children! 

Please stay firm!  I did, and it work out for us!  He was for 6 months a stay home Dad...now he knows for sure HOW MUCH WE AS MOTHERS DO!

CayShek
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 8:19 PM
I'm so sorry you are going through this hun! Its very hard when the responsibilities aren't 50/50.
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findingserenity
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 8:40 PM
Hes jealous the babies are closer to me than him...well, he gets home from work and he wont even spend 30 mins with them but stay outside c chatting with neighbor, smoking and drinking beer


Quoting Ichthus:

What's the point of you going back to work if all it's going to pay for is daycare?? If it's not making you any income beyond that then I wouldn't see the point in working outside the home if you don't find it fulfilling. Explain to him that even though you don't get a paycheck, you DO work every day, all day, 24/7. Sorry; I hope you work it out so you're happy.


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raegan1221
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 8:46 PM

I don't blame you either. You need help with your kids at night and he's there with you and he's Dad..he should help. He gets upset because the kids are closer to you and them him but he should be up helping at night and that might give him a connection too with them. 

TashaLav
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 8:47 PM
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I'm so sorry that SUCKS! I would never put up with that! I work at home, so I can make my own hours, but even if our 3yr old ds wakes up for a drink, my husband will usually wake up to get ds a drink...why would your kids be close to him? He doesn't provide care for them? You didn't make those kids alone and you sure as hell shouldn't have to raise them alone!!

OHgirlinCA
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 8:48 PM
He won't teach you how to drive? He sounds like a controlling ass.
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