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i feel so alone and unappreciated....

Posted by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:10 AM
  • 20 Replies
I have been married for 12 years and it seems like things are on a downward spiral. My husband acts like he doesn't care anymore. He never helps with house work yard work or the kids. We have none of our own but are raising his sisters kids. She has little to do with them. It seems I am the only one taking care of everyone. The boys are 3 and 4 yrs old and are always into something. My husband works then goes out with friends every night comes home eats and falls asleep. On weekends he is rarely home. I have no me time. He has all the time he wants. I tell him I need a break he doesn't care. How do I get him to take responsibility or atleast help out more. I can't do it all by myself any more. I'm getting worn out.
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:10 AM
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Replies (1-10):
MixedCooke
by Silver Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:21 AM
1 mom liked this

stop doing it all, honey do list, do less for him, remind him that these are HIS sister's kids not yours, so it is easier for you to walk away from them than for him (not that you would).

EmilysMom2010
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:25 AM
2 moms liked this
Ugh. I would flip the fuck out(excuse my language) but there is no way in hell he would be going out while I am taking care of HIS family. Nope. Not happenning. Leave for the night. Let him figure out how to deal. You did. Throw him to the wolves.
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aunt_of_2
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:29 AM
I stopped doing his laundry and cooking for him. He just started wearing his dirty clothes to work. He works in a dirty factory so its not like he has to wear good clothes everyday. But people started looking at me funny when he wore the same clothes for a week and a half. I tell him I need time without the boys he says why you don't anything but sit home all day. why are men so clueless?
aunt_of_2
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:36 AM
I make plans To go out with friends he always messes it up. He comes home drunk or has been drinking and I will not leave him here with the boys if he's been drinking. And the rare occasions I do go out for the night I come home to a house that looks like a hurricane came thru. I feel like giving up and leaving for good but I can't leave the boys. Yes they are his sisters kids but I treat them likethey are mine and love them too much to leave them like their mom did.
Lindalou907
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 5:59 AM
1 mom liked this

Is he an alcoholic? He is setting a lousy example for the kids. Bless your heart for being there for them. Do the two of you have legal custody of the kids? If you left him would you be able to take them with you?

aunt_of_2
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 10:17 AM

BUMP!

CDMelty
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 10:45 AM

How old is he? Sounds like it might be a mid-life crisis

JennPearce
by Jenn! on Apr. 30, 2012 at 12:30 PM
All I can say is sorry :( stop doing things for him so he can learn to appreciate what you do. Hugs!
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windsails
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 1:02 PM

men are just stupid and selfish when it comes to stuff like this, they tend to think since they work and support the family then they "deserve" to go out and then come home whenever they feel like it, pure selfishness...how to fix it? let me know if you or anyone can figure that out....but there are ways of "dealing" with it, stop doing everything.....period! i am going through that right now, i let the kitchen go (it is killing me) but not as much as i thought it would, i am not cooking either near as much as i did before, it is getting his attention that i am not a slave and dirt under his feet to be disrespected....when they come home and they're hungry and there's nothing to eat, that gets their attention real quick...good luck to you

aunt_of_2
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 1:38 PM
Yea my house is a total wreck right now. I did like u let my kitchen go don't cook for him just for me and the boys. Don't do his laundry and hr just wears dirty clothes like he doesn't care. That's his problem he acts like he doesn't care at all about anything but what he wants to do. It's so frustrating. He comes in and theres nothing to eat he will tell me he is hungry and ill tell him he knows where the kitchen is and he just goes to bed hungry if I don't fix his food. He has reverted to being a 2 yr old and acts helpless. Grrrrr...... men!
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