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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

What do I do now?

Posted by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 10:14 AM
  • 1 Replies

I'm posting this here because this group seems to give the most sound advice. So here goes..

DH and I had our 1st baby in 2005 and got married a few months later. I was barely 20 and he was 19. We met when we were both 18. So this all happened really fast. I became a SAHM while DH worked like crazy to support us. Fast forward to 2007. We finally get a house and I start working to help us afford it. A few months later I find out I'm pregnant with baby number 2. I work until I hit 35 weeks then take maternity leave. DH gets a better job and I become a SAHM again. The type of job my DH has is physically demanding and he works 5-6 days a week and gets about 50-60 hours a week (if not more sometimes). He's been working this type of job since 2008 and he hates it.

I don't love being a SAHM but am glad that I get to stay home and raise the kids. But I feel very isolated and deal with depression. I don't have any friends to talk to and I'm a little socially awkward so it's not easy for me to make friends. Anyway, we started talking about me going to school back in 2010. I would love to be a L&D nurse. So I had planned on starting school Fall of 2011. But come to find out Dec. 2010 that I was pregnant with #3. And would you know she was born Aug. of 2011. So that put school off for a year.

Now here is my issue. Since then I've been thinking about it and especially since my birthday this past March but I don't want to go to school anymore. I'm 26 years old and I don't want to be starting a career at 30 and competing with people many years younger than me. And while I would love to be a L&D nurse, the thought of dealing with actual sick people kinda grosses me out. The only problem is that we live in a small town and there are not a lot job opportunities here and moving really isn't an option. I've never really known what I wanted to do with my life. And I feel like I never gave myself the chance to figure it out because I went from being a young, free 18 year old to being a 26 year old wife and mom. All I know is that I want to do something with my life, I just don't know what. I feel that I lost myself before I even knew myself. Gosh, there's so much more I could say about how I feel but I'm going to stop because I think I've covered my current issue. I feel like such a mess. =/

I'm not sure what kind of advice I'm looking for, if any. But maybe some of you ladies know what I'm talking about and can give me a little insight on how to deal with all this confusion and lack of direction.

by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 10:14 AM
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MamaCat1121
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 10:32 AM
I have two kids and ill be 26 this year...my sutuation is similar. I had my first at 20 and his dad was never there so i worked 3 sometimes 4 jobs to make enough money. Then met my husband now and 8 months in the relationship i got pregnant with #2 i work a crazy job and feel like i never got those "fun" years. But i focus on meeting new parents by getting my oldest involved in stuff. Soccer...tball...even just a fair day. You meet people and your still with your kids. It sucks at times, i guess my advice is that ive chisen to focus on being a great mom and of you have to work then keep looking and you'll find something that fits you and that you can enjoy.

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