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CAN YOU BEAR A LOVELESS MARRIAGE?

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Look at the scenario: Dad loves mum. Children love mum and dad. Mum doesn't love dad anymore. Children want mum and dad together. What would you do?
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by on May. 5, 2012 at 3:23 PM
Replies (21-26):
akgraff
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:34 AM

try what you can to make it work and find the spark, it's not happening, let it go and move on. It's best to be in a strong loving marraige to show the kids, than to just make it barely work for "the benefit of the child" which, it doesn't benefit

all4Him999
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:42 AM
1 mom liked this

Mum needs counseling, and then mum and dad need marriage counseling.  You don't break up a family because you decide not to love him anymore.  You took vows, it doesn't say until feelings change, it says until death...get help and work through this.  Don't be selfish and make your family another statistic.  Divorce is easy, staying married through hard times is difficult but that's the vow you made.  You knew this was for life. What,  did you think your "feelings" would remain the same for 50 years?  Feelings are fickle, they shouldn't control your behavior.  

FabulousMum
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:47 AM
We'll give it a try.


Quoting MomToovey:

 Not knowing why you don't love him, it's hard for me to say what I'd do. But I do want to let you know that love is a choice, not an emotion. So if you choose to love him, you will. Do you WANT to love your husband? That's the question you need to be asking yourself.


If so, then do it, and do everything you can to keep it exciting - date nights out, date nights in, sex often, talk all the time about anything, everything and nothing, and make sure it's fun and that you're not always doing the same things over and over again.


If you don't want to love him, it's not fair to him to stick around. He deserves someone who will fall head over heels in love with him every morning she wakes up. And lying to him, robbing him of that, is only going to make things worse for all of you, children included.


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FabulousMum
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:48 AM
I think you're right.


Quoting MomToovey:

 Not knowing why you don't love him, it's hard for me to say what I'd do. But I do want to let you know that love is a choice, not an emotion. So if you choose to love him, you will. Do you WANT to love your husband? That's the question you need to be asking yourself.


If so, then do it, and do everything you can to keep it exciting - date nights out, date nights in, sex often, talk all the time about anything, everything and nothing, and make sure it's fun and that you're not always doing the same things over and over again.


If you don't want to love him, it's not fair to him to stick around. He deserves someone who will fall head over heels in love with him every morning she wakes up. And lying to him, robbing him of that, is only going to make things worse for all of you, children included.


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MooreBoysMama
by Bronze Member on May. 7, 2012 at 9:53 AM
This makes me sad :-(


Quoting BannerElkHogans:

tell the kid's to get over it beause no 1 stays together anymore!


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FabulousMum
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:53 AM
Yes. Counseling. Mum hasn't gone for that, you know. A trial will do.


Quoting all4Him999:

Mum needs counseling, and then mum and dad need marriage counseling.  You don't break up a family because you decide not to love him anymore.  You took vows, it doesn't say until feelings change, it says until death...get help and work through this.  Don't be selfish and make your family another statistic.  Divorce is easy, staying married through hard times is difficult but that's the vow you made.  You knew this was for life. What,  did you think your "feelings" would remain the same for 50 years?  Feelings are fickle, they shouldn't control your behavior.  


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