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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Good Sex Should Not Have to Last All Night Long - Do you think all-night sex is overrated?

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Good Sex Should Not Have to Last All Night Long

Posted by Sasha Brown-Worsham on May 7, 2012 

red bullThe other day, I stumbled across an article on CNN discussing the "other male problem." It was referring to premature ejaculation (men who can't hold on longer than a minute). And while premature ejaculation (PE) is its own nightmare, the idea that women want long, pounding, all night sex sessions is simply just outdated and wrong.

Women talk. And most of what I hear from my friends and myself is that 10-15 minutes of actual intercourse is plenty. Sure, we want foreplay and romance and cuddling after, but a man who can last 10 minutes is usually right on target.

And yet if you talk to men, you get something else entirely.

They joke: "I am going to give her the best 10 minutes of her life," they might say. But behind that bravado is actual shame and feelings of inadequacy as if 10 minutes is somehow way too short.

And while obviously there are exceptions -- after all, what honeymooner or early couple doesn't love the occasional all-night sex session? -- generally speaking, 10 minutes is plenty.

We get sore! We get bored! For many women, 10 minutes is enough to hit their orgasm, so anything after that just feels a little like overkill and may result in boredom (and soreness). If you can get her to orgasm, you have done your job, good sir. You can stop now.

I know I don't speak for all women, and sure, there are likely women who like to be banged all night long. Good on them. Talk with your partner. If she is like that, then carry on. But many, many women are happy and satisfied with a 10-minute session bookended by a little foreplay and a little cuddling.

"Lasting" is lovely, but give me 10 skilled minutes most days and I am a happy and satisfied woman. I have things to do!

Besides, usually even "all night sex" had some periods of rest. Think multiple times over one time that lasts 3 hours. Our vaginas need some rest, dudes. Chafing is a very real problem.

Do you think all-night sex is overrated?

by on May. 7, 2012 at 6:29 PM
Replies (51-59):
allensavannahs
by on May. 8, 2012 at 3:08 PM

 na its not 0verrated... but then i wouldnt know i havent even had 10 minute sex in couple of months

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jonellg
by on May. 8, 2012 at 3:08 PM
1 mom liked this

if it lasts "allnight" you're doing it wrong. The goal is orgasm, and it's nice if it comes soon lol

funnymom29
by on May. 8, 2012 at 3:38 PM

I sure wish someone could explain this to my dh!  He thinks he has to last for an hour or more.  I can have an orgasm after 10-20 minutes and then I'm thinking please hurry up cuz it doesn't take long after that for it to start getting kind of painful.  After being flipped around and repositioned for about the 100th time I'm starting to wonder if it would be rude to yawn cuz I'm so tired!

fireeyes81
by on May. 8, 2012 at 4:01 PM
1 mom liked this

I HATE sex that goes on and on... and on!!  It's the absolute worst.  You dry out, get bored, it starts to hurt, you get sleepy, you get angry and then you start to wonder if there is something wrong with you that he can't get it off... LOL.  Seriously though, there is no reason for sex lasting longer than an hour.  Even 30 minutes is too long.

workoutmom2b1g
by on May. 8, 2012 at 4:46 PM

Maybe when I was 20, all nighter was great. 3 kids later, a house, a dog, laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc etc etc etc, 20 mins in most cases these days is just fine! 

Redwall
by on May. 8, 2012 at 7:22 PM

Way overrated.  I need to sleep!

Myruhbel
by on May. 9, 2012 at 2:21 AM
I don't think it even lasts 10 minutes for us. :/ hehe although 10 mins would be nice!! It feels more like...4 minutes. •falls over• whoever has it for 10 mins is lucky indeed. Lol I am highly envious.
AnGLInterrupted
by Kendall on May. 9, 2012 at 12:03 PM

OMG no!  At some point I'd like to SLEEP!  And after awhile things just start to hurt.

amandaxshawn08
by on May. 9, 2012 at 12:06 PM
This...


Quoting CrazyLife1996:

I have a husband that can go all night and we do. Sometimes I'm in the mood for something quicker. Both are equally satisfying.

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