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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

its all hitting me today :(

Posted by on May. 11, 2012 at 7:47 PM
  • 16 Replies

ive been doing so good trying to move on from my husband cheating,and today its been all im thinking about,im so depressed about it,and im replaying everything in my head,and im not being the best mom today,i just wanna crawl under the covers and stay there until the day is over,ive been smoking alot more too, idk im just super stressed about it..

 ***DEBBIE***

by on May. 11, 2012 at 7:47 PM
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Replies (1-10):
rowansmum
by on May. 11, 2012 at 7:57 PM
2 moms liked this

Been there (well sorta,  my dd's donor left us when I was 16 weeks pg after being wonderful and amazing up until that point and haven't heard a word from him since) and there are days like that.  I still have them but its so much better now.  

Someone suggested something to me that I really took to heart and it helped me 100%.  Go get a notebook.  Something pretty,  you'll be looking at this every day so you're going to have to like it.  Each day write something positive about your day,  your life etc in it.  Maybe throw in an inspirational quote or two.  I did it right before bed and it put me in a good mindset to sleep.  Kept away all the bad dreams too :)  When you're having a day like you are, read the journal.  Then reflect on all the things you've been blessed with :)  

Life can be rough some times but you can do this!  Think of the worst case scenario,  its already happened right?  So its all uphill from here!

Sarah725
by on May. 11, 2012 at 9:02 PM

 I would be the same, I'm so sorry!

graciesmom2010
by on May. 11, 2012 at 9:05 PM

that sounds like a great idea,i will def try that!!! thanks :D

 ***DEBBIE***

LiveByTheSun
by on May. 11, 2012 at 9:31 PM
2 moms liked this
You have to decide if this is something you can get over. If you can't, you can't stay in your relationship. A looooonggggg time ago my bf (at the time, DF now) acted inappropriately with another girl and it really hurt me. Whenever I feel myself getting mad about it again, I think of this one memory of him. A memory that reminds me that he is good hearted, funny, kind and ONLY human. People screw up. This memory.. It reminds me to be thankful for the 99.9 percent of the time he does things right and allows me to look past the .01 percent of the time he does something wrong. Maybe you can find a memory like this of your husband and focus on it when you feel yourself getting upset. Sometimes you have to love people even when they've acted like lesser versions of themselves. You must know he is better than that, or you wouldn't still be with him.
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princess8228
by on May. 12, 2012 at 3:22 AM

I know its hard, i been there it took a LONG time for me to forgive him. You forgive but never forget. Good luck!

mal546
by on May. 12, 2012 at 3:39 AM

My husband did the same to me. I had a good week where I tried to stay positive and the next week I was falling apart again. I find it difficult to trust again and if I ask a lot of questions, he hates it. They just want you to snap a finger and suddenly trust them again. They don't realize that they have to earn your trust. they may be great for a week and then they start to ignore you again. It is really hard. I go to a therapist but sometimes I just feel worse about the whole thing. Are yiou going for therapy? Part of my problem is that the woman still works with him. Does yours still see the other woman?

aly211a
by on May. 12, 2012 at 8:12 AM

Good morning ladies, I'm so sorry to hear about what your going through.  My husband and I were in a similar situation but he was emotionally cheating, also the "other woman" lived 2 streets over from me :/ I heard so many stories about them from other people that my head was spinning with emotions.  Finally one night he approached me and told me almost everything.  I felt great afterwards, or so I thought.  A week later I became depressed again and was always thinking about things and wondering.  I was so upset I wrote a letter to the company she worked for and told them everything my husband told me (she did some financial things for our business).  I thought it was only right of me to be honest with my husband because he was being so honest with me, so I showed him the letters and he wasn't upset at all, he thought I had every right to do it.  So then I finally broke down and asked him everything, everything and anything I ever thought or was told by someone else about them.  He told me EVERYTHING!!! After having that talk I feel amazing and we both couldn't be happier.  I learned so many things and looking back I don't think their whole "relationship" was as bad as I imagined.  My advice, try to talk to him, tell him you want to know everything.  If he wants to make this work then you both need a new fresh start.  This way here there are no more questions.  It's very hard to listen to the whole story but in all honesty it helped my husband and I out so much.  I couldn't be happier right now and I wish the same for you and your husband.  Best wishes xoxoxo

graciesmom2010
by on May. 12, 2012 at 2:44 PM

we arent going to therapy at the moment. i know counseling might help.and hes not seeing the other women..we moved out of that state,so we r away from all of them..thankfully

 ***DEBBIE***

MomToovey
by Marianne on May. 12, 2012 at 2:45 PM

 I am so sorry momma. I hope things pick up for you soon.
hugs

graciesmom2010
by on May. 12, 2012 at 2:48 PM

thank you..i try and try to believe him,but he has always given me a reason not too,and now that things r getting better,its hard for me to just give in and trust him.what keeps going through my mind is when he said,''i dont consider it cheating''.. i felt so hurt when he said that, he made out with 2 different girls and he doesnt think thats cheating,hes a jackass,but as of now,thinngs r much bettrer other than me thinking about all this crap and ihave the lowest self esteem ever,beczuse of him,i feel like im not good enough for anyone.

 ***DEBBIE***

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