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Is Moving In With Your BF A Big Step?

Posted by on May. 25, 2012 at 7:56 AM
  • 20 Replies

In the past, one would have to get married before moving in with a man. Nowadays, moving in your boyfriend is a common trend. As a relationship progresses, depending on the level of commitment, the discussion about moving in together is bound to come up. By the time this conversation comes up, the two of you are probably spending so much time together, and are either at his or your place that it seems to make sense to move in together. The reasons seem justifiable; less commute, less money spent on rent, less money spent on shopping for two houses, and clothes will be easier to find in one house rather than split between two houses.

by on May. 25, 2012 at 7:56 AM
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by on May. 25, 2012 at 8:38 AM
I think everyone is different. Honestly for me we decided to move in prior to getting married. I think was a good experience because we knew what it was to around each most of the time. And also of hand how we would be living together in a home., We are married now and things have not changed. They are better than ever after almost 10 yrs.
by on May. 25, 2012 at 8:43 AM
We also moved in together and I'm glad we did :)
by on May. 25, 2012 at 9:00 AM
We moved in together, but we never really dated we knew from the start we would get married just a question of having the money to go get the paperwork. My fil is terminally ill and in his early 60s, I look back at moving in together as time we could've lost together because we each would've had our own place. Its how mil looks at it
my dad is one of those how dare you live together before your wedding day people. He came over to "talk" to me when he found out we were moving in together. He swears up and down I came over the next day and told him he was correct after I thought about it and blah blah blah. My dad is crazy though, my mom looked right at him when he got mad and told him I would never say that.

My cousin moved in with his girlfriend of 2 years, 3 years of whys to his proposals of marriage and they broke up. He told his current girlfriend that till they start planning a wedding he wanted seperate places, he was very hurt the first time. I think it depends on who you are and your relationship. But where 30 years ago it was seen as questionable and they claimed caused divorce, I recently read an article where it was better to live together 12 to 18 months before getting married, not engaged, but actually married. You get to see the other persons habits, the way they act all the time, their best, their worst.
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by Kendall on May. 25, 2012 at 9:30 AM

Yea it's a big step.  We moved in together before we got married.  Things just kind of fell into place and worked that way.

by Ruby Member on May. 25, 2012 at 9:33 AM

For me with him it was a big step....if it had been someone else probably not so much.  DH was a bit of a butterfly when we got together so moving in with him scared the living daylights out of him but made me feel like this was a big commitment.  I had other guys ask me to move in and although I didn't wasn't much of a big deal because I already felt their devotion to me.....with DH not so much.

by on May. 25, 2012 at 9:36 AM
My bf and I were dating 10 months when we moved in together. A year later we went our separate ways. We are now back together engaged and have a child.
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by on May. 25, 2012 at 1:13 PM

 Depends on the people

by on May. 25, 2012 at 1:26 PM

 For me it was a very big deal b/c it went against everything I had always believed in.  I thought long and hard on it, and I did it.  I had been divorced and he had been divorced and we both had children.  We didn't want to make a mistake again.  I wanted to marry again, at the time him not so much.  I had faith though that our love would change his mind.  It did when we were building a house and I was making plans to move into the house with him. My family didn't know we were living together; my dad lived about 25 miles from us & thought he still lived with his brother a few miles from me, the rest of my family lived a 1000 miles away.  Our kids never mentioned it to him.  Dh knew it would come out when I moved though and he knew my family would not approve.  He realized then how much I was willing to do for him, and he realized he loved me enough to give in to his fear of marriage and he asked me to marry him.  We've been married now for 27 years and are extremely happy.  We have kids that have lived with their spouses before marriage also.  We prefer marriage first, but we can't say anything and we never judge.

by on May. 25, 2012 at 2:27 PM
We had 2 children before we lived together. When our first son was 3 months old we finally moved in together. Married a couple of years later.

Almost 18 yr together
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by Bronze Member on May. 25, 2012 at 2:39 PM

 i dont know if its a big step. it wasnt like that for us especially bc we were 18 and 19 at the time. the big step was moving into our own place after we got married

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