I don't really know what I would do until it happens.
At this point I would say I would have to learn to forgive but I would not stay with him. God says that you can get a divorce if your spouse was unfaithful. I feel if he really loves me like he says he would not take a chance in destroying our marriage by cheating; also, I could never trust him or look at him the same. I imagine we would have too many issues to be happy. And besides we both agreed cheating was a deal breaker for both us so he knows the consequences.
Yeah...and I don't think I ever said it was an excuse. If anything it was a chain-of-causation, but that's about it.
Quoting RaLeighsMommy11:
Yeah I understand that. I just don't think that it's an excuse for it. But im glad they r able to work it out now
Quoting LadyByrdNest:I agree. It is a cowards way of ending things. But most people cheat, then communicate. Very view communicate, then cheat which is the case with this couple I know. He communicated with her his issue and problems within the marriage, but didn't want to end the marriage, was hoping she'd change etc....
Quoting RaLeighsMommy11:
Well he should of grew some balls & did it. Cheating is cowardly
Quoting LadyByrdNest:
Quoting RaLeighsMommy11:
There is no excuse for cheating. Get a dang divorce if you wanna get your needs met! She may be in the wrong for treating him that way but he should of been a man & left her
Quoting LadyByrdNest:
Quoting coupon_ash_back:exactly.
I personally think women that will stay with someone like that must not think much of themselves.
The women that I've known personally who have stayed with a man that cheated on them was because the women realized after the affair and after therapy that she was actually a big reason the husband strayed in the first place. Now, I did not say she was the cause of the husband straying, but one of my friends told me that she had been ignoring her husband sexually, and emotionally, and even verbally abusing him for years, and he had even tried to get them to go to couples counseling before he finally cheated. So, she did feel partly to blame, that's why she stayed and gave it a second chance. Now they are doing fine!
That's funny because that's kinda the same thing he said to her when she was ignoring him for all those years..."Why don't you just divorce me if I'm not making you happy?".
Quoting LadyByrdNest:Yeah...and I don't think I ever said it was an excuse. If anything it was a chain-of-causation, but that's about it.
Quoting RaLeighsMommy11:
Yeah I understand that. I just don't think that it's an excuse for it. But im glad they r able to work it out now
Quoting LadyByrdNest:I agree. It is a cowards way of ending things. But most people cheat, then communicate. Very view communicate, then cheat which is the case with this couple I know. He communicated with her his issue and problems within the marriage, but didn't want to end the marriage, was hoping she'd change etc....
Quoting RaLeighsMommy11:
Well he should of grew some balls & did it. Cheating is cowardly
Quoting LadyByrdNest:
Quoting RaLeighsMommy11:
There is no excuse for cheating. Get a dang divorce if you wanna get your needs met! She may be in the wrong for treating him that way but he should of been a man & left her
Quoting LadyByrdNest:
Quoting coupon_ash_back:exactly.
I personally think women that will stay with someone like that must not think much of themselves.
The women that I've known personally who have stayed with a man that cheated on them was because the women realized after the affair and after therapy that she was actually a big reason the husband strayed in the first place. Now, I did not say she was the cause of the husband straying, but one of my friends told me that she had been ignoring her husband sexually, and emotionally, and even verbally abusing him for years, and he had even tried to get them to go to couples counseling before he finally cheated. So, she did feel partly to blame, that's why she stayed and gave it a second chance. Now they are doing fine!
That's funny because that's kinda the same thing he said to her when she was ignoring him for all those years..."Why don't you just divorce me if I'm not making you happy?".
I am not sure this is a topic that I am faced with I jsut learned right before christmas that my dh had a 5 year affiar with a woman and they have a 4 year old son together (the same age as our youngest son) so that is a situatuation that we are trying to figure out if we can work out or not. When there are children involved it is a very difficult thing to work out and especially when the other woman and dh has a child along with you and dh has children.
Quoting Jordynsmommy93:My husband adn i are are STILL working on gathering all the peices up from our marriage. It takes alot of work, patience and love. We're getting through this. Hardest part is now he is expecting a baby with the girl he had an afair with in august.
Do you and your husband have any children together? Is this August of 2011 you are speaking of? I am glad to hear that you two are working on your marriage but also remember that she might have ideas of her own that include him that he hasn't considered and that you both will have to deal with.
I love my boys
Dh and my argument today made me so mad, and realized he is lazy
Would you be mad about this? *poll*
- 2lilmamas
on Jun. 4, 2012 at 10:43 PM