See what CafeMoms are saying about saving time this holiday season..
ok, so, i've only been on here a short time and i've noticed something, ALOT of women speak of the husbands, boyfriends, fiancees, whatevers EXTREMELY negatively. They talk about them like they are dogs to be trained and like they rarely,if ever, do anything right.
Granted- some women speak very highly of their SO- ALSO i understand some women are just venting as i have also done which is fine, i get that.
For everyone else i ask, why?
i notice that no one (that i've seen anyways) has any posts that are like :
i feel so bad for my husband, last night i let my emotions get the best of me and i nagged and nagged him and browbeat him until he just went to sleep to get away from me
So i'm thinking, what if?
what if we asked ourselves 'what am i doing wrong?' 'what am i doing that might cause this reaction from my SO?'
what if we had realistic expectations of our SO and our relationships?
what if we didn't expect them to be similar to any Nicholas Sparks books or Disney Movies?
what if we accepted and loved our SO in spite of their short comings, weaknessess, and *shivers* bodily functions/smells
what if we showed them we respected and appreciated them?
what if we took just as much care of their fragile egos as we wish they would do with our emotions?
what if we complimented THEM?
what if we noticed every little thing they do RIGHT instead of everything they do wrong?
what if we took what they say at face value instead of over analyzing and twisting it to make it about us?
and what if we expected nothing in return for doing all of this?
i'm sure some people would say "well he never does any of those things for me, why should i do that for him? "
because SOMEONE has to go first, someone has to take the first step.
I wonder if they would turn around and respect us more, compliment us more, be more loving and caring and actually WANT to be around us more?
I wonder if we were the wives, girlfriends, fiancees, whatevers that they needed US to be if they would naturally become what we need them to be?
What if we were SELFLESS in our relationships instead of SELFISH?
what could change?