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Please, Dont come in here just to tell me to get a Divorce

Posted by on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:22 PM
  • 135 Replies

So LONG story short DH and I have never had it easy but recently we have had another bump in the road. But some good came from it...we FINALLY had an open, honest , mature conversation about our relationship.

DH is an admitted narcissist and says that he has tried to be happy but as a perfectionist he will never be happy...even if he was sitting on millions and sleeping with Miss. Universe. He says he is tired of hurting me and loves me and wishes I never would have married him because I deserve better. I deserve a man who I can actually satisfy. While he was saying all of this he is telling me he'd hoped to get me through nursing school and then left him for a surgeon or something.

It was hard to hear all of this but still sweet that he is willing to remain unhappy to get me to a point where I can stand on my own two feet.

I am unhappy but but for different (more fixable) reasons.

He is unwilling to go to counseling but will try to get on some anti anxiety meds which he desperately needs and see if that helps things.

I guess I feel like because Love has never been the problem for us that we can get through this and be happy all the while he is telling me that he will never be happy. Even if we broke up he would be miserable but in a new way and it would spare the family the pain of going through it with him.

I guess Im looking for some encouraging words as I DO NOT want to get divorced and am not one to give up so easily. He tries but simply cant bring himself to be a good husband.

What to do? What to do?

by on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:22 PM
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Replies (1-10):
lillybug222
by Silver Member on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:23 PM
6 moms liked this
Pray.
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BlueRay
by on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:24 PM

Agnostic....believe me...I wish I wasnt right about now :-/

Quoting lillybug222:

Pray.


ListaPaMas
by Member on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:24 PM
Enjoy the good moments
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ProudMommy51006
by Bronze Member on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:26 PM
1 mom liked this
Awww, I sincerely hope anti anxiety meds will work wonders, I know they will help. It is fantastic that he is will to go to counseling. Good wishes!
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anime.princess
by on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:27 PM
1 mom liked this

Find someone else on the side.

BlueRay
by on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:28 PM

I hope the meds turn out to be a miracle in a bottle but I hate to get high hopes. And he is not willing to go to counseling. To proud...typical narcissist

Quoting ProudMommy51006:

Awww, I sincerely hope anti anxiety meds will work wonders, I know they will help. It is fantastic that he is will to go to counseling. Good wishes!


BlueRay
by on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:29 PM

Never

Quoting anime.princess:

Find someone else on the side.


Fields456
by Silver Member on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:30 PM
8 moms liked this
Quoting BlueRay:




Well I will pray for you
BlueRay
by on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:31 PM

thank you OXO

Quoting Fields456:

Quoting BlueRay:




Well I will pray for you


Fields456
by Silver Member on Jun. 24, 2012 at 9:32 PM
Well the most imoortant thing is he is being honest with you. Hopfully the anti anxiety. Meds. Or anti depressants ( which the dr might recommend). Will help. I know he is opposed to counseling but maybe over time he will change his mind. Most men see conselling as them admiring to being weak and not in control.
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