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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Would you stay in a unhappy marriage for the kids?

Posted by on Jun. 25, 2012 at 11:52 AM
  • 130 Replies
Would you stay in unhappy marriage for kids? (honestly)
by on Jun. 25, 2012 at 11:52 AM
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Replies (1-10):
MBorati-Collins
by on Jun. 25, 2012 at 11:57 AM
No. Not a chance I'd ever say in an unhappy marriage, not for the kids or anything else. I need to be happy to make them happy.
JennPearce
by Jenn! on Jun. 25, 2012 at 12:00 PM
2 moms liked this
Yeah, I probably would.. :/ not saying I don't have a happy marriage, but if dh & I were to go through a really rough patch, I would stay in hopes that things would get better, because our kids love their dad. He's military too, so I wouldn't want to separate our time because it's already limited as it is. In past relationships, if I wasn't happy I would be gone in a flash. This is different. I am married and we do have kids. I don't think I could unless he cheated or was abusive.
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lilfishbigocean
by on Jun. 25, 2012 at 12:01 PM
1 mom liked this

 Everyday.

My kids have what they need and a lot that they want.
For that, my friend, I will bite the bullet.

Who's not to say that he doesn't do the same though?
Hmm..

Mommy4000
by Bronze Member on Jun. 25, 2012 at 12:01 PM

Yes

Momof2almost
by on Jun. 25, 2012 at 12:03 PM
1 mom liked this

 Nope.  Life is too short to be unhappy. 

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ListaPaMas
by Member on Jun. 25, 2012 at 12:05 PM
Yes until theyre old enough to understand
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MsRkg
by Bronze Member on Jun. 25, 2012 at 12:08 PM
3 moms liked this

Nope. If I'm not happy, then my kid won't be either. Children feed off of their parents emotions and well being.

CDMelty
by Bronze Member on Jun. 25, 2012 at 12:45 PM
9 moms liked this

Yes. My marriage is my children's family. It's bigger than just me and dh. It's their home, their security, their world. I can't tear apart 3 children's worlds just because I'm not happy. I believe that mood doesn't count for much. I believe that happy doesn't matter.  What matters is what I do and how I do it. If I'm unhappy, I'll go to a shrink and see if there are any other reasons for it first, before I'll blame my marriage. I know plenty of people who've gotten divorced and gone through custody battles and setting up holiday schedules and all that stuff and found out after the fact that they'd just needed Prozac.

If it was an abusive marriage, I'd haul my kids out faster than light. Happy don't matter, but safety sure as hell does.

nicole2884
by on Jun. 25, 2012 at 1:49 PM

i would do everything i could to try an make it work , i would go to counseling , work my hardest to fix things an give it a full year before i would even think about leaving 

Journey311
by on Jun. 25, 2012 at 1:57 PM
4 moms liked this

 I would stay.  I don't depend on my husband or marriage for my happiness.  If I'm not happy then I need to look to myself first and figure out why before I bring upheaval to my entire family.  I've been married 8 years, and there have been times when we've both been miserable.  We've hit rough patches that lasted weeks or months, but each time we've come through them.  I'm watching my best friend go through a divorce that could have been avoided.  I see her kids on a regular basis, and I would never wish that on my own kids.  They are miserable and don't understand why mommy left and they have 2 houses now. 

With that being said, I wouldn't force something that isn't there in my marriage, and there are certain circumstances (infedility, abuse, alcoholism/drugs) where I would be gone with the kids in a heartbeat no matter how miserable they might be without their dad.

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