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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

sacrifice in a relationship/marriage

Posted by on Jul. 7, 2012 at 10:48 PM
  • 26 Replies

How much are you willing to sacrifice in your marriage/relationship? Is there such a thing as too much sacrifice?  here's my story:

My hubby and I are both in the military and live 6hrs apart, he came home from an 11 month deployment in Feb. and ever since he's come home things have been HORRIBLE!!! so we split, a lot of things led up to our separation, too many to list, but really it all just boils down to us not handling our business the right way. so we split and we both started seeing different people. About two weeks ago my husband texted me outta the blue and we talked and for the first time ever we got along, mostly because after two years of being angry I have FINALLY forgiven him for an affair.He came down and spent time with us and again we got along, it was crazy. when we had to say our good byes I teared up, it made me realize how much I have missed him and I hate the we live in two different states. So I have been thinking about putting in for an early out and moving to be with him..that may not seem like much of a big deal but with everything we've been through its a huge deal.  I honestly feel that by me making that sacrifice I'm really committing myself to "us". I'm nervous though, thats me giving up my job for a man..and I've been miss INDEPENDENT for soo long idk how to rely on a man. I guess I'm needing some supportive words and what are some sacrifices yall have made for your men? do you regret them?

by on Jul. 7, 2012 at 10:48 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Kaybean
by Bronze Member on Jul. 7, 2012 at 10:50 PM
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If it meant trying to give 100% and saving my marriage, I would.
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CameronsMommy23
by on Jul. 7, 2012 at 10:53 PM
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What did he say about you moving to be with him? Is he for it and asking you to move?

If he doesn't know or hasn't talked about it with you I'd keep working on things and re evaluate moving at a later time. If he has asked you to move in I'd probably still take more time to see how the relationship plays out. You can always move to be with him at any time ya know. Best wishes to you!!
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JillyBilly6
by on Jul. 7, 2012 at 10:54 PM

I've given up everything for my husband at this point. At least that is how I feel, lol

Give it some more time. Think on it. Why have you not divorced if it has been this long? Does he still want the relationship?

tennisgal
by on Jul. 7, 2012 at 10:57 PM

You're not giving up your career "for some man" your making a compromise with your DH. I woudn't just up and quit, but I would have no problem making a move in that direction to be with my DH. Now, I've always been a SAHM so my opinion is probably a bit skewed, but still I would do it for him. Would he do it for you??

katemarie97
by on Jul. 7, 2012 at 10:58 PM


Quoting CameronsMommy23:

What did he say about you moving to be with him? Is he for it and asking you to move?

If he doesn't know or hasn't talked about it with you I'd keep working on things and re evaluate moving at a later time. If he has asked you to move in I'd probably still take more time to see how the relationship plays out. You can always move to be with him at any time ya know. Best wishes to you!!


He says he wants me to move to be with him, I mean the first words out of his mouth when we first started talking again was "move with me to california" and I was just speechless. I'm nervous things wont work and then I will look like a fool

MsMikeyy
by on Jul. 7, 2012 at 11:00 PM

I have sacrificed a lot for my husband and just enlisted in the army but I feel like it gets me nowhere. I don't really regret any of the sacrifices I have made but I do wish he would do the same. If I was you, I would talk to him about everything and see how he feels. Then if he agreed, I would deff move. Good luck with everything. Hope it all works out.

katemarie97
by on Jul. 7, 2012 at 11:00 PM


Quoting JillyBilly6:

I've given up everything for my husband at this point. At least that is how I feel, lol

Give it some more time. Think on it. Why have you not divorced if it has been this long? Does he still want the relationship?

He wants the relationship, my biggest concern is that he's not ready for it. We've never lived together so I'm not sure how he'll react to the change

katemarie97
by on Jul. 7, 2012 at 11:02 PM


Quoting tennisgal:

You're not giving up your career "for some man" your making a compromise with your DH. I woudn't just up and quit, but I would have no problem making a move in that direction to be with my DH. Now, I've always been a SAHM so my opinion is probably a bit skewed, but still I would do it for him. Would he do it for you??

I think he would do it, not give up his career but I think he would move down here to be with me. My hubby's licsense is suspended and yet he talked a friend into renting him a car and he drove it six hours to see me, knowing damn well he could go to jail if he got caught..so that alone is a big sacrifice

ambermario4ever
by Bronze Member on Jul. 7, 2012 at 11:05 PM

i moved away from all my friends and family to be with my hubby and that was even before we where engaged. we have now been happily married for 6 years and i dont reget moving at all.

kjbugsmom1517
by Bronze Member on Jul. 7, 2012 at 11:07 PM
Ive sacrificed sooooo much for my hubby and kids its crazy. If i knew then what i know now i would have done it but done it differently. Im not sure id up and quit my ccareer for a "what if". Sounds like there is alot of doubt still. Specially if id been independent for so long id wait.
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