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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

May I please have opinions on this rant?

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So my future husband has had this guys trip planned for the last few months... No biggie! He goes every year.  One of the guys cancelled because of his new girlfriend, which I informed my SO was going to happen. The SO informed the rest of the guys because it will increase how much everyone has to pay and because he planned the whole trip he feels responsible.  He suggested inviting another male friend that no one is really fond of but is reliable.  Everyone declined.  One of the other guys going takes it upon himself to invite some random chick.  

I try really hard not to be the jealous wife, but I'm sorry. When my husband is telling me he doesnt want me to go because its his time to let loose and drink as much as he can, piss wherever he wants, talk about completely inappropriate things and just be with his guys, and now some other woman is going?! I have to admit he is NOT happy about it, and it was not his decision. But it just still isnt right.  It isn't a matter of trusting him.  But I dont know this woman, and she isn't emotionally attached to any of the men going and there is going to be A LOT of alcohol.  I'm not comfortable with the situation at all.  And they are all camping.  Its not like everyone has seperate quarters. Its all very open.  Am I wrong for feeling this way?

To me it is all very hypocritical... Opinions please ladies... I really hate fighting with him, and he is already very frustrated with his friend.  What do I do?

by on Jul. 11, 2012 at 9:44 AM
Replies (41-50):
CameronsMommy23
by on Jul. 11, 2012 at 3:38 PM

 I'd be pissed too but not at DH since he didn't invite her. I'd ask DH to talk to the guy who invited her and tell him that it's not appropriate and uncomfortable for him! If your DH planned the trip then this guy should have asked if it was ok with him to bring a woman along. If the guy won't un invite her then he could tell that man not to come at all. No wife would be happy about that situation so his friend has to understand that!

MsRkg
by Bronze Member on Jul. 11, 2012 at 3:39 PM

If you're secure in your relationship with your husband don't panic. If he's angry about it, he'll probably still be angry when he goes, and if everyone does managed to get plastered , chances are he's more likely to tell off your friend and the girl, than do anything with them. While alcohol lowers your inhibitions, you act more off of your subconscious than anything else, and subconsciously he's most likely to be angry and not do anything.

I personally wouldm't worry too much, but I don't see the sense in fighting over something that your both mad at in the same sense. Instead why don't you just simply ask him not to get to drunk but just buzzed or something instead, so he can have a more clear mind during the trip, if that will ease your worries.

the.real.me
by Member on Jul. 11, 2012 at 3:44 PM
1 mom liked this
if its just a guy thing I would have no interest in going at all. As soon as some girl goes, its not a matter of not trusting but I WOULD WANT TO GO TOO! Id be jealous of the fun time to be had! She wont end up going... no worries
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MomToovey
by Marianne on Jul. 11, 2012 at 4:45 PM

 I wouldn't so much be concerned about what she may or may not try, but I would be extremely upset if a woman was allowed to come after I had been told there's no way that I could go too. And if I were in your situation and my SO told me he was unhappy about it, I'd want him to tell the friend who invited her how he feels. Not like a heart to heart or anything, but let the guy know he's unhappy with the choice. I'm sure someone knows some GUY that will get along with everyone that can fill the empty spot. Good luck

countrygirlkat
by on Jul. 11, 2012 at 4:53 PM

I would feel the same way you do.  I don't know what to say to do though. 

rayroe2
by on Jul. 11, 2012 at 4:58 PM

 I wouldn't let up. I am sorry my husband wouldn't be going. just tell him he can get piss drunk at home because you are not comfortable with some other female being there or ask since this other female is going if you can go!

motha2daDuchess
by Bronze Member on Jul. 11, 2012 at 5:24 PM

I would be wondering why he still thought he was going....

wulfeyes05
by on Jul. 11, 2012 at 6:48 PM

Tell him, if some strange woman you don't even know can go then so can you. If he doesn't like it tough tittie.

hotmama0824
by on Jul. 11, 2012 at 6:52 PM
I would be pissed off!! I would tell him how you feel.
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DixieL
by Bronze Member on Jul. 11, 2012 at 7:05 PM

I agree with you. It doesn't even have anything to do with being jealous. I just think if you can't go then she shouldn't go either. If I were your husband I would cancel on them too since he said he wants to be able to drink how much he wants and go to the bathroom wherever he want's. I don't think he should go without you now. It's not that I wouldn't trust him, but when men start drinking a lot you never know what they are going to do. They don't even know what they will do. I would insist on going or your husband not going

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