So, this afternoon I checked the mail, and there was a bill from the hospital addressed to my husband. Hubby was at work, and I normally never open his mail, but I was just curious about the amount of the bill (I knew it was from the other day when he got some bloodwork done). Upon opening it, I saw that they enclosed a letter suggesting that our family apply for the reduced, or even free rate.
We don't have insurance and are very low-oncome (DH is a college student and only makes 10k a year at a pizza place), but our (almost) 1 year old son has medical assistance. I was THRILLED to see this paper, as I have been needing to see a Dr. about a couple things.
Anyway, DH gets home and sees the bill on the counter, the envelope opened, and he is very obviously irritated. He asks why I opened it, and I answer that I was just curious about the amount, but that they included a letter about applying for the hospital's low-income payment program. He gives me "the look", and says "Does this have your name on it?". I just kind of stare at him, and he asks me again, "Is -your- name on this bill?" So I answer, No, it's not, and he goes, "Don't open shit that's not yours."
I try talking to him again about the program, and he goes off on a long tirade about how he doesn't want to bother with the damn hospital or give them any more of his money, and how the hell does that have anything to do with his bill, and I am just calmly trying to explain that the program is free, and I would like to see a Dr.
Well, he just storms off to the basement and I stayed up here with DS, but I could hear DH slamming doors downstairs and just generally being dumb.
We've been married for 1 1/2 years, but together for almost 6 years. I stopped working a couple months before we got married and have been staying home with our son ever since he was born. DH is the sole provider, but he told me that the finances are shared and that I shouldn't feel like the money he brings home isn't mine too. Even though he says that, he still gets really weird about me looking at the bank account, or giving us a budget, or even suggesting cheaper things at the grocery store. For some reason, I thought "Hey, we're married, married people look at each other's bills because they share them!" but apparently DH does not feel this way, at all.
SO! This was very long-winded, but I wanted to ask you ladies on here, do you open each other's mail in your household? Or am I totally nuts-o for thinking that it's okay to do that. (To be clear, if it were a personal letter, I wouldn't have opened it.)
Update: I talked to DH this morning. He apologized for talking down to me, and admitted that he overreacted and took his frustration from the amount of the bill out on me for opening it. I told him I wouldn't open anymore of his mail without his permission first.