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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage
Ladies, I really enjoy CM (most of the time) I can identify a lot of times, I'm divorced, remarried. I have exhusband issues, ex wife issues and a big blended family. I am no where near perfect. And I never pretend I am. But, day after day I read about women who post stories about men who cheat, abuse, humiliate and are all around shitty husbands/boyfriends/fathers. These girls I feel awful for. But what I'd like to know is..... Why do most of these girls have no self respect? Why do women think its ok to get involved with men who have numerous children with numerous women? DO they REALLY THINK THEY ARE GIING TO CHANGE? And why do they girls continue to have babies when no one is working? Or they have no place to live? Stop having children you can't afford. Stop being with men that treat you like shit. Try getting married to a decent man who loves you BEFORE you have 5 kids. Finish school, stand on your own feet and HAVE SOME FREAKIN SELF RESPECT. Or we will have daughters and sons who think it is okay to live like this.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 9:53 AM
Replies (81-82):
merryvoice
by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 10:05 PM

I notice that a lot of people don't care about details like that, but those things make us who we are. I don't share a lot of my past either, because most people only care about the now. So I do like to listen to anyone who is willing to share! 

Quoting raegan1221:

 Thank you very much. I really appreciate that. Very rarely does anyone take an interest in my past relationship. It's nice to get out sometimes ya know. Thanks for that.

Quoting merryvoice:

Yay! So happy for you.  =)

Quoting raegan1221:

 I think it is, too. They think these men are fixable and it's too late when they finally figure out they aren't. We just don't need to go into a relationship where someone needs to be "fixed". But yes, my boyfriend and I have been together going on three years now. He treats me well:).

Quoting merryvoice:

I think that's why a lot of women stay...because they think they can fix them. But I'm so glad you left and I hope you have someone who treats you well.

Quoting raegan1221:

 I have been there myself.  I married my ex husband when I was 20 years old....and we started dating at 18...he was abusive one month in both physically and emotionally. He strangled me for the first time when I was 19 right before we got engaged. I still married him and it only escalated. He called me every name in the book, smothered my face in dirt, hit me while I was pregnant with our son.  The only reason I left was because of my son when he was 3 months old.  He never hit my stomach....and he never hurt me in front of our son except one time. That is when I left.


 


Now to answer your question: I don't know.  I wish I could understand that.  I went to three different counselors when we split up...and I couldn't understand what I was thinking.  Even at the time, it was like my head was in a bubble. At the beginning of the relationship, I thought I could save him. Yes, I am one of those...I thought I could save him. He had a very bad childhood.  Then when I knew I couldn't it was too late because he had beat me down emotionally so bad that I didn't care about myself.  I quit fighting back.  I quit caring about anything except our son.  So when he did that in front of him, it kind of woke me up.  6 years later, I have coming very far and can stand like you and ask that question "why?" because it doesn't make sense.

 


 


raegan1221
by Silver Member on Oct. 9, 2012 at 10:12 PM

 Well, thank you:).

Quoting merryvoice:

I notice that a lot of people don't care about details like that, but those things make us who we are. I don't share a lot of my past either, because most people only care about the now. So I do like to listen to anyone who is willing to share! 

Quoting raegan1221:

 Thank you very much. I really appreciate that. Very rarely does anyone take an interest in my past relationship. It's nice to get out sometimes ya know. Thanks for that.

Quoting merryvoice:

Yay! So happy for you.  =)

Quoting raegan1221:

 I think it is, too. They think these men are fixable and it's too late when they finally figure out they aren't. We just don't need to go into a relationship where someone needs to be "fixed". But yes, my boyfriend and I have been together going on three years now. He treats me well:).

Quoting merryvoice:

I think that's why a lot of women stay...because they think they can fix them. But I'm so glad you left and I hope you have someone who treats you well.

Quoting raegan1221:

 I have been there myself.  I married my ex husband when I was 20 years old....and we started dating at 18...he was abusive one month in both physically and emotionally. He strangled me for the first time when I was 19 right before we got engaged. I still married him and it only escalated. He called me every name in the book, smothered my face in dirt, hit me while I was pregnant with our son.  The only reason I left was because of my son when he was 3 months old.  He never hit my stomach....and he never hurt me in front of our son except one time. That is when I left.


 


Now to answer your question: I don't know.  I wish I could understand that.  I went to three different counselors when we split up...and I couldn't understand what I was thinking.  Even at the time, it was like my head was in a bubble. At the beginning of the relationship, I thought I could save him. Yes, I am one of those...I thought I could save him. He had a very bad childhood.  Then when I knew I couldn't it was too late because he had beat me down emotionally so bad that I didn't care about myself.  I quit fighting back.  I quit caring about anything except our son.  So when he did that in front of him, it kind of woke me up.  6 years later, I have coming very far and can stand like you and ask that question "why?" because it doesn't make sense.

 


 


 

Faith, Hope & Love "I Will Have Faith in YOU, Hope For YOU To Come Home To Me & Love YOU More Every Day".
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