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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage
Ladies, I really enjoy CM (most of the time) I can identify a lot of times, I'm divorced, remarried. I have exhusband issues, ex wife issues and a big blended family. I am no where near perfect. And I never pretend I am. But, day after day I read about women who post stories about men who cheat, abuse, humiliate and are all around shitty husbands/boyfriends/fathers. These girls I feel awful for. But what I'd like to know is..... Why do most of these girls have no self respect? Why do women think its ok to get involved with men who have numerous children with numerous women? DO they REALLY THINK THEY ARE GIING TO CHANGE? And why do they girls continue to have babies when no one is working? Or they have no place to live? Stop having children you can't afford. Stop being with men that treat you like shit. Try getting married to a decent man who loves you BEFORE you have 5 kids. Finish school, stand on your own feet and HAVE SOME FREAKIN SELF RESPECT. Or we will have daughters and sons who think it is okay to live like this.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 9:53 AM
Replies (61-70):
coffeelover66
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:14 PM
Here is my excuse for not using commas im at work and on my phone during break i type fast and so whats yrs


Quoting meganisamom:

That's. Not thats. Who needs spell check? Just wondering. Should we mention the commas you forgot?


Quoting coffeelover66:

And im entitled to mine and i think u need to use spell check now thats my opinion ;-)




Posted on CafeMom Mobile
fnlyhappy65
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:36 PM

It's usually a lot more difficult when you are in a situation to get out and to recognize that you deserve more because you are stuck in the cycle.

meganisamom
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:48 PM
Ohhhh do you try to insult my spelling and grammar and then when you get called out for your own, you use the "I'm on a phone at work" excuse. Gotcha.


Quoting coffeelover66:

Here is my excuse for not using commas im at work and on my phone during break i type fast and so whats yrs




Quoting meganisamom:

That's. Not thats. Who needs spell check? Just wondering. Should we mention the commas you forgot?



Quoting coffeelover66:

And im entitled to mine and i think u need to use spell check now thats my opinion ;-)






Posted on CafeMom Mobile
meganisamom
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:49 PM
And just an FYI.... yrs is an abbreviation for years. Not yours. Sigh.


Quoting coffeelover66:

Here is my excuse for not using commas im at work and on my phone during break i type fast and so whats yrs




Quoting meganisamom:

That's. Not thats. Who needs spell check? Just wondering. Should we mention the commas you forgot?



Quoting coffeelover66:

And im entitled to mine and i think u need to use spell check now thats my opinion ;-)






Posted on CafeMom Mobile
CDMelty
by Bronze Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:52 PM
2 moms liked this

These ARE the daughters who think it is okay to live like this. At least the ones I know are. Their parents lived like this and now they do.

meganisamom
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 8:06 PM
One of the best responses I've seen. You hit the nail right on the head.


Quoting CDMelty:

These ARE the daughters who think it is okay to live like this. At least the ones I know are. Their parents lived like this and now they do.


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timswife_momof2
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 8:09 PM

i would no way marry someone who has alot of kids. my husband has one with a previous girl he was married too by the way, and i had one from a previous boyfriend and we i got married and established a good family life before i even thought aout having my last baby.

meganisamom
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 8:19 PM
We are a blended family. People think we're crazy. Lol. I have 4 from my first marriage. He has 3. It's a lot of work and communication, but it's something I enjoy. I love all the kids and they are all so close and love each other. We are both well established in our jobs and were before we got involved. It's not easy. But it's worth it. :)


Quoting timswife_momof2:

i would no way marry someone who has alot of kids. my husband has one with a previous girl he was married too by the way, and i had one from a previous boyfriend and we i got married and established a good family life before i even thought aout having my last baby.


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raegan1221
by Silver Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 8:52 PM
1 mom liked this

 I think it is, too. They think these men are fixable and it's too late when they finally figure out they aren't. We just don't need to go into a relationship where someone needs to be "fixed". But yes, my boyfriend and I have been together going on three years now. He treats me well:).

Quoting merryvoice:

I think that's why a lot of women stay...because they think they can fix them. But I'm so glad you left and I hope you have someone who treats you well.

Quoting raegan1221:

 I have been there myself.  I married my ex husband when I was 20 years old....and we started dating at 18...he was abusive one month in both physically and emotionally. He strangled me for the first time when I was 19 right before we got engaged. I still married him and it only escalated. He called me every name in the book, smothered my face in dirt, hit me while I was pregnant with our son.  The only reason I left was because of my son when he was 3 months old.  He never hit my stomach....and he never hurt me in front of our son except one time. That is when I left.


 


Now to answer your question: I don't know.  I wish I could understand that.  I went to three different counselors when we split up...and I couldn't understand what I was thinking.  Even at the time, it was like my head was in a bubble. At the beginning of the relationship, I thought I could save him. Yes, I am one of those...I thought I could save him. He had a very bad childhood.  Then when I knew I couldn't it was too late because he had beat me down emotionally so bad that I didn't care about myself.  I quit fighting back.  I quit caring about anything except our son.  So when he did that in front of him, it kind of woke me up.  6 years later, I have coming very far and can stand like you and ask that question "why?" because it doesn't make sense.

 

Faith, Hope & Love "I Will Have Faith in YOU, Hope For YOU To Come Home To Me & Love YOU More Every Day".
meganisamom
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 8:55 PM
I Always think "if I knew then what I know now". :)


Quoting raegan1221:

 I think it is, too. They think these men are fixable and it's too late when they finally figure out they aren't. We just don't need to go into a relationship where someone needs to be "fixed". But yes, my boyfriend and I have been together going on three years now. He treats me well:).


Quoting merryvoice:

I think that's why a lot of women stay...because they think they can fix them. But I'm so glad you left and I hope you have someone who treats you well.


Quoting raegan1221:


 I have been there myself.  I married my ex husband when I was 20 years old....and we started dating at 18...he was abusive one month in both physically and emotionally. He strangled me for the first time when I was 19 right before we got engaged. I still married him and it only escalated. He called me every name in the book, smothered my face in dirt, hit me while I was pregnant with our son.  The only reason I left was because of my son when he was 3 months old.  He never hit my stomach....and he never hurt me in front of our son except one time. That is when I left.



 



Now to answer your question: I don't know.  I wish I could understand that.  I went to three different counselors when we split up...and I couldn't understand what I was thinking.  Even at the time, it was like my head was in a bubble. At the beginning of the relationship, I thought I could save him. Yes, I am one of those...I thought I could save him. He had a very bad childhood.  Then when I knew I couldn't it was too late because he had beat me down emotionally so bad that I didn't care about myself.  I quit fighting back.  I quit caring about anything except our son.  So when he did that in front of him, it kind of woke me up.  6 years later, I have coming very far and can stand like you and ask that question "why?" because it doesn't make sense.


 


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