Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

First relationship, lasting?

Posted by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:48 PM
  • 30 Replies
How many are still with (and still happy) their first real love? How often does that first serious relationship last forever?

My bil got married last weekend to a highschool classmate of mine. I love her, love him, but dh and I agree that they may not be the best match. They are each other's first real meaningful relationship and from our perspective there are a lot of little flags in the way they treat each other that might not make for a healthy long lasting marriage. Things that seem small now but could be huge later; like the fact that she doesn't want to breastfeed and he would like her to, so he is hoping that finances will be tight enough that she will not really have a choice rather than talking it out now about all the reasons they feel the way they do and coming to a mutual understanding before the baby is born (they are not currently pregnant but might become pregnant soon). We truely hope they are happy together until death do them part, but dh and I can't help feeling a little concerned. I guess I'm just trying to reassure myself that they will make it!

by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:48 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Lorena
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:54 PM
I am with my high school sweetheart/first real relationship.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Gina1109
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:57 PM
1 mom liked this
My husband was my 1st boyfriend, my first love, well my 1st everything ( except kiss)...We starting dating when I was 15 and he was 17 and been together ever since. Got married last year and been together a total of 7.5 years.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
londamg
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 1:04 PM
1 mom liked this

i dont think it matters how young they are or if its their first real love. I think a marriage last long (a lifetime)  when BOTH partners are willing to work at that relationship no matter how tuff life gets for them. i think so many couples just call it quits when they have a really ruff spot its just easier to leave then put in the long hard work to get over the situation. if that makes sense. I am still with my first. we have had a lot of ruff spots in the beginning but we are in a better place now and love each other so much more. we have been married for 10 years now but first started dating about 15 years ago. 

.LoVeMyBuG.
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 1:04 PM
I'm with my first love. 7 years and stronger than ever. And I don't think a disagreement over breast feeding is a relationship deal breaker, let alone a red flag warning lol.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
olivejuice2
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 1:14 PM
Quoting .LoVeMyBuG.:

I'm with my first love. 7 years and stronger than ever. And I don't think a disagreement over breast feeding is a relationship deal breaker, let alone a red flag warning lol.



The breastfeeding thing is just the most recent example, and maybe it isn't a big deal. I see it as potentially a big deal because a lot of people (myself included, though I stay out of other people's choices about how they feed their baby unless they ask for my advice) feel very strongly about bfing or not. When you don't have a kid at all it can seem like a non issue, but when she gets pregnant they may realize the problem goes deeper than they thought. It's not a dealbreaker, but it could be the straw that broke the camel's back. Who knows, maybe dh and I are being ridiculous, though I know their mom had some concerns as well. I hope we turn out to be very wrong!

I'm glad you guys are doing well! Best wishes.
MaddiesMama09
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 1:20 PM
1 mom liked this
I've been with my husband for 11 years now. We have been together since we were 15. He was my first true love. My bf before him was my first true lust, though. Haha. I'd say our marriage is pretty good considering we haven't killed each other after 11 years (if we made it through the immaturity of teenage years, I'm confident we will do just fine)
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
k_hall1784
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 1:24 PM

If we weren't ripped apart by my moving 600 miles north when we were in high school, I am 95% certain that we would still be together, my first love and I. But, I am happy now. I have found a great man who takes good care of me and our family, whom I just so happened to meet (in hs) when I moved up here. It's going on 9 years together. 

hoping for a homebirthPhotobucket

Lilypie Trying to Conceive Event tickers









Mommy980106
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 1:25 PM
1 mom liked this
DH has been my first everything. Together for 17 years and will celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary in December
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
maria1613
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 1:26 PM
I'm not, thankfully. We were bad as a couple, and now that we've both grown up a little since then there's no way we could have worked. We're still good friends though but that's it, better friends than a couple, and will always be my first love but that's it
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Hottmomma607
by Trica on Oct. 11, 2012 at 1:28 PM
1 mom liked this
I've been with my real love for 17yrs. marriee 16yrs. *shrugs*
No one else can't say rather whats real, long lasting for others. Outside looking you don't? Unless its the obvious ie cheating, abuse!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN