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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Marriage Tune Up

Posted by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:26 PM
  • 10 Replies

Every marriage will have its ups and downs. Regardless of the length of time you have been married there will be times when you wonder what you were thinking when you said “I Do”. The best way to avoid these types of feelings is to see the warning signs that, maybe, your marriage is in need of a tune up. There are 7 distinct signs that will show it is time to step back and nurture the most important relationship in your life.

1. Have you lost the desire to impress your mate? This is the most dangerous of all the warning signs and a tune up is needed quick. We all want to be loved and adored by someone else. We do things, even subconsciously, to impress them. When you no longer want to get that attention from your partner your relationship is in danger.

2. Do you spend a lot of time apart and not mind? Think back to when you first began dating, being apart was horrible. You could not wait to get home from work so you could be with them. A lunch hour did not pass without speaking on the phone. When this urgency diminishes it is time for a tune up.

3. Have you forgotten how to talk to each other? All too often couples get into a rut when they come home from work, complete their family obligations and then fall on the couch to watch television until they go to sleep. People are forgetting to talk to each other and that can damage your marriage.

4. Does romance seem like a hassle? Never forget that you wanted to spend your life together. Don’t forget the love notes or other signs of affection. While not an everyday thing, showing your partner you still feel “silly” about them is a great marriage boost.

5. Are you online more than in touch with your partner? It is no coincidence that the onset of social media has increased the divorce rate. People forget they have a real, loving person at their side. Unplug and share with your loved one instead of an internet friend.

6. Have you stopped saying good morning? By saying good morning you make a connection with your partner that lasts all day. It is a simple way to let them know that they are the first thing on your mind. It is a lasting feeling throughout the day. When you do not speak in the morning you have lost that connection.

7. Have you stopped greeting each other with a kiss? Another simple warning sign. When you stop doing this simple kiss it will lead to loss of affection in other areas.

These signs that your marriage may need to be tuned up are not designed to say that your marriage is failing. Everyone, at some time, will fall into a routine or pattern that they do not like. The trick is to see that pattern and do something positive about it immediately. Every marriage has the chance to be the perfect marriage if each partner decides that it is worth the effort.



Read more: http://blog.mytherapistmatch.com/7-signs-you-may-need-a-marriage-tune-up/2010/04/25/#ixzz2915Q7Z7D 
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So how's your marriage? Do you think you need a tune up?

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by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:26 PM
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Replies (1-10):
AprilJ24
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:29 PM
We could def use a tune up. We are totally focused on parenting and are forgetting about our marriage. :(
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olliesmommy2
by Bronze Member on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:30 PM
Bump
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LexRi0709
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:34 PM
According to this I could use a "tune up". But when one spouce works overnights and sleeps all day you don't always get the daily interactions to talk or say good morning. While for the most part I agree with this, you must take into account work schedules.
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Nunyabusiness
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:36 PM


Quoting LexRi0709:

According to this I could use a "tune up". But when one spouce works overnights and sleeps all day you don't always get the daily interactions to talk or say good morning. While for the most part I agree with this, you must take into account work schedules.

Oh I know other factors play into it.  :)  I just was looking up stuff to spice up a marriage, stumbled on this and thought it was a good read. 

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LexRi0709
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:39 PM
1 mom liked this
Its definately a good article. I just wish there was more for those couples who must work opposite shifts. I take care of the kids all day while dh sleeps, then works all night. Most of his days off are spent sleeping in the living room while he tries to stay awake for "family time". Its definately not easy, but we make it work the best we can.

Quoting Nunyabusiness:


Quoting LexRi0709:

According to this I could use a "tune up". But when one spouce works overnights and sleeps all day you don't always get the daily interactions to talk or say good morning. While for the most part I agree with this, you must take into account work schedules.

Oh I know other factors play into it.  :)  I just was looking up stuff to spice up a marriage, stumbled on this and thought it was a good read. 

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beeky
by Alexandra on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:45 PM
1 mom liked this

I answered no to all 7 questions, so a tune up isn't necessary.

MagicTemptation
by Christina on Oct. 12, 2012 at 3:33 PM

Bumping so I can read later.

Nunyabusiness
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 8:03 PM

BUMP!

ShannaBee
by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 1:21 PM

Thanks for sharing. We need a slight tune up but it's mainly the stress and hassle of different schedules.

ReadWriteLuv
by Casey on Oct. 13, 2012 at 1:25 PM
I disagree with several of these. I don't think I need a "tune up". I think it's ridiculous to expect your relationship to maintain that giddy, first few months of dating feeling throughout the length of a marriage.
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