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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Feeling depressed that dh has to work so much

Posted by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 7:10 PM
  • 17 Replies

I don't know...but today, I started feeling a little down that my husband has to work all the time and different shifts. Night shift-which means he sleeps all day the next day, afternoon shift, morning shift...you name it, he works it. He was off a few days the first week of November, but because of that he has to work alot for the rest of the month. I feel like I never see him. I am home with the kids, by myself, all of the time. He is either working or sleeping.

This has been going on for months now. He said he will cut back on shifts next year when our new baby comes. I just feel depressed for some reason. Honestly, I am beginning to think is it even because of his schedule or is it pregnancy hormones or is it because I am alone alot. Hell, I don't know. I just don't know. Why do I feel like this?

juggling

by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 7:10 PM
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Replies (1-10):
lucky2Beeme
by Silver Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 7:14 PM

Is that stressful time of year. holidays are coming, kids and adults get anxious. Try to look at it as Thank God he works enough hours that we get by and I don't have to leave my kid/s and work too.

JudesAwsomeMom
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 7:16 PM
I'm used to my dh being gone. He works mon through Friday out of town. I just had a baby to so it really sucks. I know how your feelin
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countrymomma81
by Bronze Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 9:09 PM
1 mom liked this

SIL feels the same way about her husband. Only they don't have kids and he's at work because he likes being there. It's literally like his hangout. 

la_bella_vita
by Bella on Nov. 15, 2012 at 10:33 PM

 My husband has times where he works a lot ((Hugs))

SareyF
by Sarah on Nov. 15, 2012 at 10:37 PM
I have felt that way. I am thankful my husband works for our family but I miss his company and feel lonely and stressed. I miss his help and even just his presence.
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lactatingloon
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 10:38 PM
My dh works all the time too, his only day off is Fridays and he just told me that he is working tomorrow and this weekend a total of 36 hours. I feel like a single parent about 90% of the time and It's been like this since last May. It's really hard, I wish you lived in the kansas city area we could entertain each other!!
crescentstar2
by Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 10:39 PM
I hear ya DH works in another state and is home every 2 weeks it can be hard. Huge
Due9
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 10:39 PM

That'd be great! at least it would make it a little easier.

Quoting lactatingloon:

My dh works all the time too, his only day off is Fridays and he just told me that he is working tomorrow and this weekend a total of 36 hours. I feel like a single parent about 90% of the time and It's been like this since last May. It's really hard, I wish you lived in the kansas city area we could entertain each other!!


juggling

MomToovey
by Marianne on Nov. 15, 2012 at 11:13 PM

 I do understand. During the slow season, my DH works 50 hour weeks - including a half hour drive to and from each day. It only gets worse during the busy times! And to top it off, his schedule changes too. They call it progressive. On his first day back after his weekend, he has a closing shift, then his shifts start progressively earlier throughout the week, until his last day of work before his weekend where he opens. The job itself is tiring enough, but the fact that he has to stay up late one night for work and then progressively train himself to go to bed earlier and earlier so he can wake up in time for work really drains him. And he goes through it every week. I feel bad for the guy.

But thankfully, he does his best whenever he's home. He helps out however he can, whether it's doing a chore or two, or keeping DD busy while I do the work. And we always get at least a few minutes of quality time together each night.

I'm sorry you're feeling down. Can you try to plan a date night in for him one night when he's home and doesn't need to be up early the next day?

aimesnyc
by Amy on Nov. 16, 2012 at 11:51 AM

That sucks, I'm sorry.  That's the exact reason why I chose not to stay home with my son, as much as I wanted to.  If I had chosen to stay home, my husband would have had to work 2-3 jobs to support me staying home and I would have never seen him.  I felt it was more important for him to work reasonable hours and have the same amount of time with our son that I do.

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